Throughout the 1980s, there was a cultural phenomenon taking place. It was something that transcended the borders of conventional style and the laws of nature. This phenomenon was: THE GREASY R&B SUPERSTAR.
All children of the 80′s can name at least one greasy, sparkly clothes wearing, always sweatty-looking R&B singer from that era. Today, I am going to ask the question: Were are they now?
Alexander O’Neal – Perhaps the king of all greasy 80′s soul singers, the man has a voice that just makes you literally want to slap somebody. Then find a lady and hope she’s turned on by the combination of that rough shit and Mr. O’Neal’s smooth vocals. Rumors of him dying of a cocaine overdose are false, thank God. Unfortunately. rumors of him going bald are not. He’s still rocking that slick shit in 2005. Ah well. I’m just glad to hear the brother has a thriving career in England and doing occasional shows in the US. I wonder if he’s still banging Cherelle from time to time. She used to be sorta sexy in a 1986, big hair, big makeup kinda way.
Ashford and Simpson – “SOLID! SOLID AS A ROCK!” The first family of greasy R&B stars, they set a precedent that many an ol’ school, hand-dancing, middle aged-to-elderly black couple still follows today. They even inspired two of the funniest characters ever featured on In Living Color,”Cephus and Reesie”. I know they’re still chillin. Still together. And still sharing hair-care products. More power to ‘em!
Freddie Jackson – Lord knows where Freddie is. I’m hoping he cut that ramp out of his hair. Then again, everybody had bad haircuts in that era, so I’ll cut brother Freddie some slack. We miss you Freddie…Someone’s gotta pick up the R&B falsetto slack since it looks like Ron Isley is going to jail for a LONG gotdamn time.
Kashif – The younger readers may not remember this brother..but he had a few adult contemporary hits back in the ’80s. Plus, he had the quintessential ’80s nigga style. He was one of those cats that stayed getting written about in “Ebony Man” magazine LONG after he stopped making hits. Posing for pictures looking like the brothers in those “Duke” haircare ads and whatnot. Whatever he’s doing, I hope he’s experiencing success at it.
Michael Jackson – What would the 80′s be without MJ? I used to play Thriller EVERY DAY before elementary school. and that was th ALBUM. That shit is STILL hot today. I played BAD to death, too. But we’re talking about early ’80′s Mike. Jheri curl on fire Mike. Still somewhat normal Mike. I won;t type anymore, because I’ve already gone on and on making fun of Mike about everything from his wierd habits to his umbrella man that accompanied him to court.
Troop – Although they made some great songs, these brothers were quite possibly the greasiest collection of singers in the history of mankind. Their SCALPS needed oil changes every 3 months or 3000 miles. I’m sure, wherever they are, someone like me is still making fun of their old haircuts to this very day.
Alright folks, let me know if I missed anybody. If you come up with a greasy ’80s R&B star whose whereabouts are unknown, let me know in the comments section. I’ll try to see if I can find out what they’ve been up to in the decades since their greasy prime. Have a nice evening.
Hustleman
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leon i adored ashford and simpson’s solid as a rock. I would Sang solid as a rock with all the feeling my 4 year old heart would allow in front of a million drunk relatives lol but is it me or does ashford look like eddie murphys vampire in brooklyn
*trembles*
Tee
Karen White, I can’t get Superwoman out of my head since Brutha Code wrote about that song last week. Ryan Cameron said she was a waitress here in Buckhead, but I think he was kidding.
ok, she wasn’t THAT greasy. LOL
You forgot Surface, and Orange Juice Jones, and hell even Ready for the world ” Oh sheila oh oh sheila”
Billy Ocean
Freddie’s “Jam Tonight” was about his hair!
You really came up with some ‘throwbacks’ on this one!
What about Lionel Richie? He was pretty greasy there for a while, LOL.
wait………
ready for the world did “oh sheila”?
i was not aware of that.
wow, you learn something new everyday.
Freddie is still around actually. He lives in Harlem and hangs out at Ashford & Simpson’s lounge/restaurant, The Sugar Bar. He did cut the ramp, kept the weight off and looks good. He is the missing link … don’t know why he hasn’t stepped into Luther’s empty shoes.
I see you forgot all about Full Force, who were the kings of the jheri curl.
I recenetly did security for an Alexander O neal concert, he still resides in Minneapolis, but he has fallen so far, a known alki and drug addict, so so sad
Man, ashford and simpson were great and so was o’neil. was never a freddy jackson fan. could never get pass the slop of his forehead. MJ was the truth and Troop, well um, they were ok. but i think you may have to put DeBarge on your list. They were holding down the Crisco as well.
What about Shai…”And if I ever…(ever fall…) in love agin…I will be sure that the lady is a friend…MY FREIND! Myyyy Friend…”
-Mikah!
LOL How could I forget about Billy Ocean, Full Force, Ready For The World, Oran “Juice” Jones and The DeBarges…LOL.
I think I’m going to devote an entry completely to Billy Ocean one of these days. He was the man LOL
Full Force still produces music. They did a lot of NSync and Britney Spears’ early stuff back when they first blew up.They’re going after that boy band money LOL.
As for the DeBarges, they did rock that slicked-back hair for a long ass time.
I purposely left Surface off because one of their members died last week. See…I’m respectful when I want to be ;)
Now Ready For The World…They deserve some kind of lifetime achievement award from TCB hairspray or something. Those brothers had an aura of activator and afro sheen about them…LOL
@ Bullet Proof Diva, don’t you bad mouth Karyn White! I used to be in LOVE with that woman LOL
@ Tee, Ashford DOES look like Count Blackula.
@ The Future, that’s a shame about Alexander O’Neal.
Uh, damn…
I would say something witty but I’m stumped so instead I’ll say this:
Damn Leon, you really know how to get a response!!! Whether in hate or in love, agreement or dissention, there’s a gang of dick riding going on…. It’s a wonder you can walk without tipping over.
And I’m out.
have you ever seen swingers?
where old boy keeps calling and leaving messages on the girl’s answering machine, and he’s super-pressed to get a response, to the point where it’s REAL sad?
she finally picks up the phone and says don’t ever call here again, you f$cking stalker.
Ditto Ready 4 the World and Full Force. Re: Full Force; never in the history of the universe have jerri curls looked so sexy…might have something to do with the bodies and chocolate skin.
That pic of Alexander O’Neal looks remarkably like Eddie Murphy in Boomerang. Have you ever seen them both in the same place? Can you say one-in-the-same?
Kashif???? LMAO!I really don’t remember this cat, but he makes me want to start singing
“Just let your soul glow…”
hmmm… greasy 80′s stars… do yall remember Stoney Jackson? He had random parts on TV sitcoms, and had this LOOOONG drippy wet jherri curl, like he sprayed it RIGHT before the director said action.
Yall named everyone else… oh and the brothers in Atlantic Starr. They were pretty driptastic as well.
Ok… I have been thinking and I came up with more…
Howard Hewitt had the drip drip when he was in shalamar…
Ray Parker Jr had the short curl. (Ghostbusters!!!)
The king of 80′s R&B himself, (whom I am shocked no one mentioned…) LIONEL RICHIE! This cat STILL got a curl. lol
Dear Leon,
Why is this man responding in your blog like the name of the site is Listen to ricland
damn!!!
Ricland, you’re actually starting to piss me off…and that’s pretty hard to do.
Your self-righteous banter about other blogger’s ideas and thoughts are nothing but mind-numbing chatter used to try to bring attention to your own dull, lifeless, pitiful excuse for a blog.
You know what’s really funny though? The same tactics that you’re using in your feeble attempt to discredit/bash/annoy Leon are the ones you so vehemently oppose when talking about his site. Hypocrisy runs rampant throughout each of your posts about Leon, Diva, and X.
Ricland, you are a very poor excuse for a black man and I pray that one day you will actually do something to credit the race the WE love so dearly. Grow up dude….
Poor Leon! This shits not even funny anymore. You have a true stalker on your hands!! Why does this nigga feel the need to reply to everyones comments in your blog.
@ Ricland—–NIGGA THIS ISN’T YOUR DAMN BLOG!!! GET A FUCKIN LIFE!!!
I’m off to America’s Most Wanted website….I’m sure I’ll find this psycho on there!!
This is like the third time I’ve come here and couldn’t get a song out of my head because if it.
*singing* Solid as a rock..rock..rock.
@Ricland
Are your serious? He has asked you to “shut up”….He said he was going to start deleting your ass! To a normal person that would be a sign that you are unwanted here, right?
Leon, delete this fool….he’s trying to ruin your blog! I’m sure the rest of your regular readers will agree…get rid of this fool!! He comments are not appreciated!!
Dear Leon,
I like your blog because the posts are funny. Then to add to this the comments would continue this, but this ricland character keeps bringing the mood down, so I don’t think I’ll be stopping by anymore.Unless ricland is your alter ego and this is all a joke because that’s what he seems like a joke.
Isn’t there a cereal called Kashif?
You tak much shit about wanting to change caste hierachy, but so far all I seem to hear from your mouth is yellow this, and black that. Tell me dickland, sorry i mean rickland what is your problem with yellow people, you think they dont have to jump through the hoops other “black” people have to? Are you perhaps jealous? Do you have some type of inferiorty complex. Why do you feel the need to attack another black persons skin tone. If you have beef with another person, try and keep your comments constructive, but attacking another persons skin color, what makes you different to a klansman? Absolutely nothing its the same bigoted bullshit spawned, except sadly it’s by another black man.
Ricland, you whined for days because Leon called you an orangatang. Complaining about how all the black people that read this blog are lost because they gleefully laughed at this. Yet you called someone a bitch. It could have been a female that wrote that comment. Matter of fact it could have been a black female that you called a bitch. You’re doing just the thing you argued about!
“It was like being in a conversation with a white guy and all of a sudden he drops the word “Nigger.”
Bottom line, Leon made a joke about how all black people look, but was too dumb to realize he was doing this.”
So it’s like being in a conversation with a white guy and all of the suddend he drops the word “bitch” in reference to a black woman.
Bottom line, Ricland made a joke aobut how all black women are bithces, but was too dumb to realize he was talking about all black women including his mother.
Ricland,
What exactly is your real purpose of commenting here?
We all need for you to find something else to do with your life instead of sitting around and starting arguments in other people’s blogs because no one will acknowledge yours.
Ricland,
Congratulations…you’re a fucking loser. But I will say this…you are one SMART fucking loser to have all of us give you the attention you so badly yearn to have.
You know, you’re like the KKK, except you HATE your OWN kind. So fucking pathetic. I really feel sorry for your kid. One, because you’re her father, and two, because she has your DNA and will most likely act just like you.
Go ahead and kill yourself already.
Did anyone mention Jesse Johnson, That nigga had like 4 Jheri curls at the same time. That niggas shirts was so shiney you woulda that he had sequins on them shits!
For the folks who may have missed the foolishness, I deleted anything with a link to one of that guy’s sites. That’s why the only comments of his still up here are the ones with no links.
I didn’t care for Ashford & Simpson, but I was really feeling Michael, Freddie, Troop, etc.
Force MD’s really had the drip drip curls in the 80s…so did Levert
Hi Leon…I stumbled onto your page by accident, but since I was here thought I’d take a look see…ok, first of all…I am LMAO @ those ALBUM covers (lmao @ albums at this point). Damn shame that I actually just BOUGHT that Troop record on CD off Ebay last week…lol. I have it on CASSETTE TAPE (youngin’s are like – cassette who?), but dammit none of the cassette players in my house are working! Then you go and put Alexander and Kashif out there…man, you’ve got me over here feelin OLD AS HELL!
Speakin of people from back then, what happened to Me’Lisa Morgan, Chapter 8 (POST Anita Baker) and The Jetts?
Anyone remember Oran ‘Juice’ Jones from his one song “Walking in the Rain?”
who sings that song I dont want to be alone said I dont want to alone its a slow jam back in the 80′s. Does anybody know?
stop lying,,,alexander oneil hasnt lived in the u.s for years and is doing well in europe and not an”alcoholic or on drugs”,,,,people and their pipe dreams! paste from recent article in music guide:He relocated to Britain, where his efforts had always been better received, and began to set up permanent shop there. His first British-only release, 2002′s Saga of a Married Man, showed him developing into a smoother and more mature singer compared to his previous output. ~ John Floyd, All Music Guide
Go on have the last word with ricland!!
riclanders@yahoo.com
brittany murphy i’ll miss u
Oh how I favourite the music music from the eighties, everything seemed to be way writer creative than nowadays penalization.
What about the Force MD;s? They were greasy too! :-) And Levert-RIP Gerald & Sean, and another dearly missed great-Luther had some Jheri Curl juice jumping off too.
Watch it yourself and you may see him. When the camera hits him, he points in internet marketing like The government. SuperFly Don Cornelius!!!!!
Devastated. I did not miss a show, irrespective of where I was, for my entire childhood. Which was where we SHONE. Some other dance show since only agreed to be trying to keep up.
Watching American Bandstand,then Soul Train on Saturday mornings and dancing like happy epileptics was obviously a great way to start the weekend….Singers should be those who is capable of doing with dignity.It could be best to have those that appeared on Soul Train during its peak years. Any ideas,hussies?
Don, appreciate the effortless cool you delivered to our lives. Opt for God and strut on the Soul Train Line while using angels.