Vending Machine: 1, Leon: 0
Posted by ListenToLeon on
May 16, 2006
I was at the New Carrolton metro station this morning, and immediately got thirsty for some reason. My thirst led me to the Amtrack waiting area of the station, where all of the vending machines are located. Deciding to get something carbonated to help jump-start my morning, I walked over towards the soda machine.
As I strolled over to vending machine area, I saw a window of opportunity open. My eyes brightened, and I’m pretty sure a twinkle appeared like in the movies. I saw a ginger ale that someone bought earlier, stuck against the glass and a bottle of Mountain Dew Code Red. The high school aged kid who apparently bought the drink was hitting the machine, but he got frustrated and walked away.
Once I watched the kid leave, I went over to the machine and decided to bump it myself, since the kid appeared to be much weaker than me. I figured it was the only right thing to do. The kid was was late for school. He did not deserve the sweet taste of ginger ale. I, on the other hand, am a hard-working, tax paying, thirsty man getting ready to slave away, picking digital cotton for the man on the very keyboard on which I’m typing this entry. That ginger ale was destined to be mine before they even poured it in the can at the factory!
I bumped the machine enough times to knock it back about 6 or inches, and to also free up the can a little. Then, I decided to buy the Mountain Dew Code Red drink behind it, to knock both loose and then save whichever one I don’t feel like drinking for later. Little did I know, the can was lodged in there a little harder than I thought. I put my $1.50 in and requested the soda, only to see it get stuck behind the ginger ale as well. Somewhere up in heaven, God is showing the clip of me cursing out the soda machine to the angels on his plasma flatscreen, hitting the TiVo button and running it back a few times so that everyone can laugh at the look I had on my face once I realized that instead of two sodas, I got no soda for the price of one. I guess I had that one coming.
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18 Responses to “Vending Machine: 1, Leon: 0”
lmao…..
By Mikey on May 16, 2006
Ditto Mikey. LMAO
By Sincere on May 16, 2006
boy, you actually made me laugh out loud. i can so easily picture that.
By candi on May 16, 2006
You seem to be having a hard time with liquids this week. First there was Evil E&J now it’s sadistic soda pop! What’s next? Malicious Milk? You may want to try water for the rest of the week! Thanks for the smile on this hard day!
By Isha on May 16, 2006
God don’t like ugly…or cheap-scates(sp)
Hey cool Breeze….you actually stopped by…thanks!
New Carrolton…took an Amtrak there…not so bad.
By Blah Blah Blah on May 16, 2006
*lol*
By Nika Laqui on May 17, 2006
Ha!! Gawd doesn’t like ugly!
By Hostess on May 17, 2006
leon i hate to say i recently found ur site and i love ur blogs u r too funny. every enry i lmao keep up the good work!
By Anonymous on May 17, 2006
at least you didnt attempt to stick your arm up there and try and get them out. then you would have been out of $1.50, two drinks and some dignity.
;)
By Stacy on May 17, 2006
Dayum…I know you were really thirsty after not getting the ginger ale OR the Dew, weren’t you?
By double L on May 17, 2006
Hi I’m new to your blog… excellent writing, I was laughing out loud. I’ll definitely be stopping by again.
By With Love, Fat Girl on May 17, 2006
Yeah, vending machines have become increasingly more evil. I blame the Taliban, but then again, I blame EVERYTHING on the Taliban. Who shot MLK? The Taliban. Who crucified Jesus? The Taliban. Why are gas prices so high? The Taliban…. and George Dubya.
By J-Bigg on May 17, 2006
I just started visiting your website and you are humorous. I can totally relate to your storys. I can vision what happenes when you write which make it even more funny!
By toya on May 17, 2006
i hate when shit like this happens.
By aquababie on May 18, 2006
“The kid was was late for school. He did not deserve the sweet taste of ginger ale.”
That will carry me until 5 o’clock.
By Amadeo on May 18, 2006
LMAO! See there you go thinking you were going to get “over” but alas the vending machine gods are evil, evil.
By Honest on May 19, 2006
I just laughed and thought of you yesterday. The same exact thing happened to me. All I wanted was some fruit snacks! lol
I banged up against the machine and some peacan swirls came out instead! I was pissed! lol
By divyne on May 19, 2006
Was Ashton Kutcher anywhere in the vacinity? LOL
By Nikki on May 19, 2006