I feel like doing something nice today. Last week, I revealed my plans to write the Holy Book of Hoe Hate” in order to strengthen the weak links among males. Hopefully, ensuring male dominance until sometime into the next millenium.
Since I had a nice weekend, I spent a little time reflecting on this. What I realized is that I did not do a good job of explaining that this group I have started is not anti-women. In a gesture of goodwill, I am going to allow one of you lovely young ladies out there reading this right now to bring me great pleasure with your mouth, vagina, and any other body parts you can find a way to give pleasure with. What better way to heal, than to share fun-filled activities with the one that initially pissed you off in the first place?
Currently, I am in the midst of a drought. Well, “drought” is a bit of a strong word. My genetalia has not dried up like a raisin in the sun. Nor has it festered like a sore, then run. It’s just…lonely. Leon Jr. jr. likes getting the right amount of attention to be content. That said, whoever the lucky lady is that gives Leon Jr. jr. said attention will more than likely get worked 12 ways from next Saturday and will probably forget the English language for a few hours afterwards.
Preferably, the lady who I “make amends” with will be someone already familiar with Leon Jr. jr. Trust me, for someone like me to be in a drought, it has to happen mostly by choice. As stated before, my bullshit-o-meter has been on point lately. Add that to the fact that I have been busy working on my writing lately, and that does not leave much time or opportunity to chase new pussy. So for the sake of convenience, I’d like to give my special “reparations” to someone whom I have already walked the dog on, or given rugburn injuries to her knees. That way, you know what you’re getting into, and you also know that I won’t put any expectations or handcuffs on you.
You know, I meant that “handcuff” thing metaphorically, but if you really are into getting handcuffed, that might be pretty fun. I’m up for it.
P.S., to all ladies actually contemplating this offer, please call me, e-mail me at HustlemanL77@yahoo.com or send a text message. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT use the comments section to express this desire and make this your personal “I fucked Hustleman so fuck you other bitches” confessional. Kissing and telling stopped being cool in middle school. Yeah…I said it.
Thanks in advance :)
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lmfao!
If someone really takes this seriously… I hope that female is a smart one AND she read the previous post to which you are referring! haha
Unless this girl “loves” (that rose colored kind of bullshit love) you OR “loves” JR. jr., after reading the previous post, she’d be the smartest to leave all of it alone… especially if she has any kind of intelligence.
Share… and share alike.
I’m with you on the whole new booty thing. I’m not interested in new dick either… just BRING ME THE GOOD DICK THAT I KNOW AND TRUST! If you get new stuff, you don’t know if it’ll be any good, right? And I HATE wasting my time with new dick that is worth a copper coin. Anywho… Good luck with that endeavor!
Holla!
LMAO @ the ode to Lorraine Hansberry.
@ Miss A, the ones that have already been with me already know that thy are going to get theirs. Why else would they come back for a repeat performance?
@ Nikki, it was actually a reference to Langston Huughes’ “Dream Deferred” poem, but Lorraine Hansburry works, too lol
boy…. you stoopid! sagittarians are the devil…. that’s all I have to say!
LOL
Ok, Leon, I so was not ready *ok maybe I was, I’ve read the archives* for this one…
Ummm…Good Luck?! I’m with Miss A…Bring On the “Old Booty”!
@ Jirzygurl, NO WE’RE NOT!
@ Tenacious, I’m saying…why make bootycall after bootycall, when I can get ‘em all done in one fell swoop?
LMAO. Okay, I was actually waiting to hear about your weekend, since you can be so candid, and my weekend was a big bust. But good luck. I hope you get some. droughts are definetly no fun.
I agree sagitarians are not the devil(at least the women are not).
LOL…now that is too funny.. I thought I was crazy for talking about giving my empress (aka the pootang) a hair cut…lol but I think you public announcement booty call tops that especially after the previous post…
well hopefully the so called “lucky ones” in your past are the kind gentle type of girls who enjoy volunteer work..
as for the new booty vs. old booty I think both sides have their perks…I think I’m gonna have to blog my view on that…
and jirzygurl is right, you guys are the devil.. I’d have to agree.
It’s 1:17 PM, and I have yet to be solicited.
Ungrateful bastards.
LMAO
Dude, great party the other day. The women were looking GOOD.
Ummm, unsolicited huh? So in theory….your response to Miss A is incorrect…since…ain’t nobody from the past calling for a repeat performance?
You kill me cool breeze!
@ Blah Blah Blah, business picked up after lunchtime ;)
@ Hassan. Glad you had fun. What the hell was that drink you gave me? I was already 4 or 5 drinks into the night, but that one took me over the top LOL
Leon, if you were a woman, you would have a lot more luck being solicited for sex…we get offered dick at least 3 times a day by strange men. Unfortunately, men have to work a little harder for it.
You have my condolences and here’s to hoping Leon Jr. get some well deserved licks…
Sincerely,
Sugar-”The Mistress”
It’s funny that you would mention old booty, ’cause I just got some of that the other day. and it was damn good too. Better than when we were together…It had been a while for both of us, so we gave each other the time of our lives…we both walked (or limped) away smiling like hell. But the good thing is that neither of us has to call the other and neither of us gives a damn if we do or not. It’s very liberating…
just my 2 cents…
You sound like Keith Sweat…LOL!!
Much as your ass parties, I don’t believe you. Liar, liar, pants on fire…
Clearly you have issues. Good luck in your search.
Dude you cleary have issues. Good luck in your search.