I don’t know how many of you have seen this video clip, but it’s funny to me for a number of reasons. The clip, featured on VH1′s “Best Week Ever” is of Barbara Walters from The View. The first part, she appears quite fascinated by Brandy’s hair. It would be cool if this were an isolated incident, but the second part of the clip features her doing the same thing to this other chick with a curly, natural hairstyle.
http://www.bestweekever.tv/2006/07/18/icymi-barbara-still-puzzled-by-black-women/#comments
First of all, Barbara Walters is wrong for calling Brandy out like that. I am a man, and I know better than to ask a woman “Is that your real hair?” in front of people. She did it on NATIONAL TELEVISION! It’s bad enough that Brandy looks like a cicada. Now the world knows she’s a bald-headed cicada.
The other chick handled it well. She was all cute and pleasant about it. I know women who would have gone off on Barbara Walters for asking something like that on live TV. Talking about “How do you get your hair to look like that?”
“HOE, I’M BLACK! THAT’S HOW MY HAIR LOOKS!”
For real, we as black people have no choice but to get used to that in today’s workforce. If your hair deviates in any way from the Eurocentric norm, some white person will come up to you and either touch it or make a comment on it at some point in your career. God forbid you wear an Afrocentric or natural style. You will get your scalp rubbed, touched or grabbed or poked. Maybe it’s because a lot of these folks don’t actually have black friends. Work may be the only chance they have to touch black hair. Honestly, you can’t just go up to a stranger on the street and run your fingers through her weave. She may pull out a blade and cut you if she just got it done and thinks you messed it up.
Still, this is my message to white folks in the office place: STOP IT! Make some black friends in your spare time if you want to touch nappy(or curly, or other variatrions of non anglo-saxon) hair. We as a people will start reporting you to human resources. That is all.
i saw the clip on vh1.com barbara walters would have been pimp slapped.
as a woman who wears locs, i do a good job of keeping hands out my head…whether the person is black or white. i don’t want people touching my hair, especially if i don’t know you.
if someone asks, i will consider it…then tell them no. i’m no one’s puppy. plus you could have just gotten finished scratching your ass or something.
Good point. I have long, curly hair (Thanks Mom and Dad) and folks in the office are ALWAYS asking me if I have a weave. LOL
Now if I walked around asking folks if they had a toupee on, I would be wrong.
LOL
My sentiments exactly!
I’m rocking the straw set right about now and I wish a bitch would touch my damn hair. White people are known for not washing their hands when they finish using the bathroom….
I hate when white girls ask me dumb ass questions like “Do I wash my hair” or “How do I get it so straight”…I’m like “I wash my hair with my toes..DUMB ASS what the f*ck do you think?”
Needless to say, the white folks in my office just tell me my hair is cute and keep it moving…..
the old manager at my store (got her ass fired now.. happy as shit.) used to always have her damn hands in my hair. and everytime i’d give her some cut eye sharp enough to cut diamonds. why that _______ never got the message.. i dont know.
would have knocked her the f**k out, if i didnt need to pay the damn bills. shit.
i have a very short cut and men (black men mostly) are ALWAYS trying to grab my head! There are only two people in this world that get to freely touch on my head: my barber and my man, if you aint either get your DOO DOO ASS fingers off my fresh shape up thank you very much.
I dream of the day that something like that happens to me. I really do. I may just wear my unpermed hair to work and not comb it, just so I can release on a bitch.
At any rate, she definitely took Brandy by suprise. I think a crucial stare and a “don’t touch my hair” would have embarassed the shit out of old mush mouth.
However I would’ve said: Barabara, first it was the Star Jones debacle, now this. What is it with you and black women? For the record, you are old and white so I expect this from you, all that aside this is an issue of respect and ettiquette. Just like I would never ask you if you have a speech impediment or ask your “real” age, even though I know you are 75 years old and have been around since moses was a baby I’d reserve those questions for private times. But since we’re asking questions: Should’nt you be more concerned with the four strands of hair that you have left atop your head and the fact that viewers are forced to look at your progressing bald spot every morning? Oh and by the way how do you keep that old wrinkled frail white skin from fallin off of your bones…is it a face lift? Invasive, right? Insulting, right? EXACTLY.
Word! I’ve had natural hair for a while now, and it just amazes me how white people think it is okay to just come up and start touching a black person’s hair. It’s bad enough when it’s a co-worker, but I’ve had it done to me by total strangers! That sh*t is not cool, and I find myself thinking “Would this honkey just walk up to some random white person and start running their fingers through their hair?” Hell, no they wouldn’t, ’cause they know that that white guy or girl is very likely to call the police or something. But as a black person, I don’t feel like I can go off on the white people like they deserved to get gone off on for fear of being seen as the angry black person who just went crazy because whitey was a little curious.
Oh well, I guess that’s the price I pay for keeping it real!
I think we should start a revolution in the workplace and pull on white people’s hair. Especially if someone comes in with a different hair style just pull on it and ask “Is this real”?
I work for a pretty conservative firm and when I wore braids my 2nd year there I remember a colleague talking to me in the hall but instead of looking at my face he kept starring at my hair line (sort of like when a dude is starring a woman’s chest). My own boss who had known me for over a year at that point asked if my hair had grown although she saw me with shorter hair a two weeks before. As a black woman working in corporate america I can go on and on as I’m sure some of your readers can as well.
Brandy should have looked at her and said “Wow, that’s a personal and obnoxious question…Do you get botoxed?.”
Barbara would have loved that on national television.
Aw c’mon ya’ll! Talking about my people so bad! We whities (really pinkies)are not ALL so stupid. I think it’s just discourteous to touch anyone without their consent, regardless of what color you are.
I’m married to a black man and his cousins, wear wigs sometimes. Even though I might know it’s a wig, I don’t say that. I just tell them their hair looks nice, but they’ll be like- “GIRL! Don’t you know this is a wig?!” So I guess it depends on who you are on whether or not it bothers you.
BUT you do have to give the white people credit for asking rather than just going along dumbly not knowing. If you’re not familiar with any black people, there’s no way for you to know but to ask. All kinds of people ask stupid questions.
Barbara Walters is SO wrong though, for calling them out like that on TV. She seems like a total freak to me anyway.
And BTW Tenacious- LOTS of people don’t wash their hands when they leave the bathroom, not just white people. I know LOTS of nasty ass people black & white who don’t.
LMAO @ baldheaded cicada
Leon, you are the truth when it comes to your description of physical appearances.
I’ve worn my hair natural (mostly twisted) for two and a half years now, and usually white folks ask real naive questions and seem to be fascinated by my hair and the many styles I wear.
I get the IG-NANT (yes, you read correctly) comments from black folks still stuck in that idea that “girl you NEED to get a perm” or that “you’ve got too much hair on your head to wear it like that. tame that!” If I had a nickel for each of THOSE comments, I wouldn’t need to be in medical school right now.
Yea them MFs used to come by my desk when I would wear my fro Angela Davis style and be like “ooooo ahhhh”….
“I wish my hair could do that”…whoo whoo whoo…
You’re right, I shoulda reported they asses to HR…
LMAO……I don’t care when people ask me about my hair..since I’m the type who will wear a long long phony pony one day and the next come back with it short and a different color just to come back a day after that with it long again…. because I have done that I think I’ve train people to stop asking but instead if they think its cute to tell me it looks cute… but now since I worn nothing but an afro, I have no touches on the hair, but I do know what you mean, when my natural hair was long people touch it all the time and it pissed me off…but when I cut it, now I’m happy people don’t touch it. Personally I think other people hair is nasty and would never touch it since I never know when was the last time they wash it, whether that person be black or white.
LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO @ anonymous’ response to Barb. HA! that was better than the post… beautiful.
If I DARE to have a phony-pony or a straw-set OR ANYTHING other than my usual straight look I INEVITABLY get asked by at LEAST ONE DUMBASS white person (usually hte jackass that sits in my cube area “Is that your hair” or “was that hard to do?”
….and I’m IN HUMAN RESOURCES! WTF????HHMPH!
Once again…your blog is on point! (sorry for the long comment that follows)
I went natural during my first year in corporate america and you would have thought I was growing a third eye or something from the stares and the questions.
I finally just sat down with the two chicks who seemed to be genuinely mystified and explained to them the whole thing. It was like Black Hair for Dummies 101 in the company conference room. They could ask questions without trying to be politically correct and with my assurance that I would not harm them for saying something crazy. I usually don’t concern myself with the “ignorance of the other” but I made an exception for these otherwise cool coworkers and it paid off. No more questions, no random pulls of the curls (thanks to that topic on hand cleansing or american’s lack thereof), no akward gawking…curiosity satisfied.
All I can say is common sense is not so common and etiquette is not taught nearly as much as it should be. Educate as you see fit. You’ll know who is being an ass and who just wants to know more about it. The more progressive ones will share the information with their friends and hopefully spare the world some pimpslappin’.
Now for all my “sistas” who snicker and ask me when my appointment for a “perm” is scheduled…school is open…bring a pen!
I normally wear my hair straight either in a wrap or whatever but now, I have braids for the summer and my Asian boss thinks its highly fascinating that “you all can do so much with your hair”… We should start reporting there asses to HR.
All “whities” aren’t stupid, however too many of those crackazzcrackas suffer from extreme superiority complex. Their logic is as such: I am white. You are not. You should be delighted that I’m so intrigued by your hair; which by the way 50 years ago I would not look at let alone touch. Be grateful. Woogidie boogidie nigger!
What is up with whites anyway? They’re memory is so fucking short. Were they not the same fucktards rocking curled white wigs during the elizabethan and victorian eras? Not just the women, but those pansie ass men, with blush, and powder to boot.
What about all of those bony white broads that come on her show with those infused weaves and nasty dry blonde clip on pieces? Does she touch that shit? NOPE.
Now all of sudden they (whities) don’t know what’s real and what’s fake…or how our hair grows. THE BASTARDS DID ENOUGH RESEARCH AND MANIPULATION OF FACTS TO CONVINE THE ENTIRE GLOBE THAT WE WERE INFERIOR AND THEREFORE BORN TO BE ENSLAVED. Come ooooooooooooon…
Who gives a fuck if they ” just go along dumbly not knowing”. That won’t be the first. When a white is inquisitive we all know they are more than capapble of researching and being EXPERTS on whatever fascinates them.
That old dumb crypt keeper Babara “Belzebub” Walters has been around the world from here to fucking Calutta, interviewing dictators, presidents, ambassadors, musicians and artists, not to mention people of every race and economic strata, but she returns to her crackazz roots and behaves like commom inbred cornfed trash by touching another persons hair in feigned inquiry on national television. What a dumb BITCH. She should’ve taken a charge and smacked that loose flimsy skin off of her face.
Sorry Ms. Adventures, there’s no excuse for that level of ignorance when you have the entire world at your disposal.
Oh and Don’t try to make the shit “equal” because black and white people are not equally dirty…lol…white people are infact nastier…that’s a ubiquitous fact.
“BUT you do have to give the white people credit for asking rather than just going along dumbly not knowing. If you’re not familiar with any black people, there’s no way for you to know but to ask. All kinds of people ask stupid questions”
^^^Ummm but asking a person do they wash their hair? WTF kinda question is that? Do white people really think there is an art to washing Black hair? I wash my sh*t the same way the Herbal Essence *w/o all the moaning* girl washes her…There’s no art to washing hair. That’s like me asking a white person do he/she bathe? I mean give me credit for asking…
I knew this topic was going to illicit responses, but I had no idea…Hahahahaha
@ Diva527, I’m guilty of trying to touch your head…but I thought I was being seductive LOL. Glad to know that it wasn’t working :)
@ 1969, I get it from both sides since my hair is curly. White folks touch it, and so do some black folks…lol.
LOL @ Honest. I knew a LOT of people would be able to relate to this topic, that’s why I put it out there
All those commenting on Brandy, I think she should have flipped it and asked Barbara a messed up question in return, too. She showed class by playing it off, though.
@ Ms Adventures, I didn’t mean to attack white people with this post. It’s just that almost EVERY black person I know has complained about this same thing, especially black women. So while this does not go out to all white folks, there enough out there that needed to get this memo lol
Anonymous sounds like she been though some shit on this topic…lol. Funny responses
@ Greg, I have a visual illustration of Brandy’s cicada-ness on this entry
http://listentoleon.blogspot.com/2004/06/profound-wisdom-of-hustleman.html
@ Natural in SC, I’ve seen that a bunch of times before. That happens a lot to folks who don’t perm their hair.
Lovin It Natural, That’s funny…Black Hair 101
@ Robyn, you can report them to yourself lol
Oh shit…the angry anonymous guy is back. (I know he gon’ call me a meth cooking cracker prostitute for calling his ass out…but fuck, he angry) “tell ‘em why you mad son, tell ‘em why you mad”
Leon, its ok that you touch my head, I’ll make an exception for you cause I occasionally rub my hands thru your “indian” huurr!
make sure the white person wanting to touch ya hair has been around black people before too! I have a new Hungarian friend who told me about her first time seeing a black person when she got to the states… she told me, “I just wanted to touch their hair! I was soooo fascinated by it! It was all I could do to keep my hands to myself. I just wanted to run my hands through every different type of black person’s hair”… take it as a compliment… haha
Some white folk ARE waaaaaaaaaaaaaay out of line tho!
I’m biracial (black/white), with blondish brown hair to the middle of my back. When I had it down to my hips, people acted like it was impossible for a mixed person to have blue eyes and long hair. I cut my hair very short once when I was about 16 or 17 and NO ONE would leave it alone even then. Both black folks and white folks seem to have this problem, however…
White people tend to have it more although a few of them try to be respectful and keep their hands to themselves. My mother is white and I’ve never seen her do this to black women, most likely b/c she has close female friends who are black, but she is an exception. I’ve had comments about my hair from all types of people. I’ve lost it with Hispanic people more than once b/c of their comments about my hair and the fact that they put their filthy hands in my hair. This bitch who was about 200 pounds and only 4’11″ said I had “nigger hair”. Well, her husband had to lift her up off the floor bleeding after that…it wasn’t a pretty sight.
I’m mixed but I know how it is when people feel free to play in my hair. It is about common sense and common courtesy. I’m a person with feelings and if I don’t know you, don’t put your hands on my hair, then make rude comments. Don’t look at me like I’m psycho if I tell you not to touch me. Now I’ll say to some of these people very calmly, “If you touch my hair one more time, I will disconnect your hand from your body”. That seems to work very well.