NOT ANOTHER FAKE ONE!

Let me start this off by saying that I am among the millions of people with a mild addiction to Myspace. I check The OFFICIAL ListenToLeon Page at least once a day to see what people have left there, and to listen to “Strokin” by Clarence Carter.

There is one thing in particular that irritates me about that site. It’s getting friend requests that are really spam for some porn site. Not that I have anything against smut. I just don’t like to be ambushed by it. Especially under false pretenses. By false pretenses, I mean some company setting up fake profiles with models in somewhat slutty poses. You can always tell, because they tend to read something like this:

“I’m Kim, 21, a college student. I love music, parties, meeting people – and yes, I’m a sorority girl and proud of it! Now that it’s so cold out I’ve been spending a lot of time indoors… I got this webcam for my birthday and so far it’s been a lot of fun! If I’m online you can watch me here:

http://www.ididntgetenoughlovefrommyfather.com/webcam/kim”

*Warning: slutty poses to come in the next four links. Nothing explicit though*

Just today, I’ve been hit up by “Kim”, “Julia”, “Jenna” and “Julia” again. Too bad Kim and Julia are fake. They’d get the business. No question about it. Jenna doesn’t do anything for me, but I’ll give her some shine on here simply because she sent me a request today too.

You see what I’m saying though? Setting you up under the pretense that some super hot chick is actually interested in something about you, only to find out that it’s a ploy to get you looking at smut. While most guys could weed this type of thing out fairly easily, it’s harder for me, because hot women actually do send friend requests to me because I make them laugh and, well…I’m me. So I have to search the page for the smut link to decipher the real ones from the spammers sometimes. Hence, the title sentence. It tends to annoy me. Especially if the model is a “12″ on a scale of 1-5.

I know a lot of the fellas can relate to this. Some of the ladies probably can, too. I just wanted to vent my frustration on the matter really quickly. I think am going to invent a Digital Pimp Slap device that tracks down the fakers and spammers and allows you to send an electric charge through their keyboard that mimicks the feeling of getting slapped in the mouth. I’ll be a billionaire, and the world will be a better place.

Post Author

This post was written by who has written 1852 posts on Yeah…I said it.

Leon, a.k.a. God's Gift to your sense of humor.

16 Responses to “NOT ANOTHER FAKE ONE!”

  1. Herb 31. Oct, 2006 at 4:20 pm #

    This is why I stick with the FaceBizzle.

  2. Sammie 31. Oct, 2006 at 4:24 pm #

    lmao its funny cuz i get at least 3 of them hittin me up a day…i dont go for the taco….i likes burritos :-D anyways good post as always…

  3. Diva 31. Oct, 2006 at 4:46 pm #

    Thanks for keeping a Diva laughing. You are too much for me.

  4. @ster 31. Oct, 2006 at 4:59 pm #

    digital pimp slap thats a good one….

  5. Peach 31. Oct, 2006 at 5:20 pm #

    I get add requests from those chicks too, guess that means i either look manish or im so hot i must be bi or something…that hurts my feelings LMAO

  6. Lunatic ILL 31. Oct, 2006 at 5:48 pm #

    You Had Me At “Slutty Poses”…

    No Homo…

  7. Misty 31. Oct, 2006 at 7:09 pm #

    LOL @ Clarence Carter’s “Strokin”, that song has cracked me up for years. It’s so pervy and gross. Shit, Clarence Carter is pervy and gross looking. I hated that video.

  8. Sister Toldja 31. Oct, 2006 at 7:12 pm #

    LMAO @ “http:www.ididntgetenoughlovefrommyfather.com/webcam/kim”. Priceless!

    I get these as well and sometimes the angle is more female-centric: “Hi, I am Amy. I am looking for new friends to gossip about shopping and boys”. Yes, Amy, how did you know I was such a loser I can’t even find platonic female friends without the help of Spam. Of course I want to chat with a blue-eyed, blond haired Playboy reject! So, what’s your take on Franz Fanon- cool or lame?

    But I never see any ads like this from men- this can be your hustle, Leon! There is a market of lonely ass women who probably would pay for the privilige of talking to a nice fellow online. Go make the lesser stunts of the world smile! And if you do, I want some royalties for the idea!

  9. dee-lish 31. Oct, 2006 at 7:16 pm #

    i need the pimp slap device not for the porn spammers, but for the lame ducksauce dudes who wanna be my friend.

    actual message from one lame ducker:

    ” baby girl, i wanna know what can i do to make you smile”

    umm, nigga, i’m already smiling on my profile pic.

  10. Hummingbyrd 01. Nov, 2006 at 10:42 am #

    I never get porn spam.

    Pornam. Spamorn.

    Sporn.

    Thats it.

    Sporn!

  11. Amadeo 01. Nov, 2006 at 2:25 pm #

    Here, Here! Gym Class Heroes have a video out for a song called “New Friend Request” that joint covers all those myspace issues.

  12. t.r.b 01. Nov, 2006 at 9:25 pm #

    love your confidence! here’s a new motto for you swagger jacked from the great “light- skinnededed” himself Luva Luva: “how you ain’t goin’ cut?…girl i’m me!”

  13. toya 01. Nov, 2006 at 11:11 pm #

    lol leon..man, that mess is why i still consider deleting my myspace page, *shits disgusting b*..oh, and i like the idea of Sporn!..lol-well the name, not the actualy thing.

  14. Rainmayun 02. Nov, 2006 at 11:19 am #

    I get about 10 of these a week. They even had bots online that would send messages to ppl on Yahoo Messenger, but I haven’t gotten any of those in a while.

  15. erin 04. Nov, 2006 at 12:18 am #

    i actually got a hit from jen. i didnt quite understand because i know my profile says hetero, and i in no way shape or form like to stare at women while they shower, sit on the shitter or study for their dmv test. so, i say you better get to work on that pimp slappin device, ill be the first customer and even host the informercial…

  16. brwn_eyes_brwngirl 06. Nov, 2006 at 12:40 pm #

    yeah I have got a few…but usually Tiffany is the one with the million request..and even though she is cute, I don’t know Tiffany nor do I like Tiffany in that happy girl action type of way.

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