I walked past a Taco Bell the other day, and it almost made me cry. I miss cheap food from my favorite stereotypical Mexican resturant chain. I could feel the tears welling up in the corners of my eyes as I pondered the thought of ordering something and potentially dealing with a hospital visit for the meanest case of bubble guts known to man.
Why has this e-coli stuff been so rampant and widespread lately? I remember back in the good ole days…when people grew vegetables that didn’t make you sh*t on yourself when you eat them. Back before cows were going mad and shaking like they got ahold of some bad heroin. Before lettuce or carrot juice ever killed any old people. I miss the days before food became scary.
God damn it, why can’t I just enjoy my damned chicken enchilada grilled stuffd burrito!? I would go to the little white truck parked on Columbia Road and buy a burrito, but I trust that thing even less that I do the tainted Taco Bell. Chipotle is not an option, because last time I ate there, my stomach started doing the Harlem Shake as soon as I got home. Alas, my craving is going to have to go unfulfilled.
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It’s the green onions and supposedly they took them all out.
My fiancee ate there and he’s still alive, lol lol
RUN FOR THE BORDER MANNNN!
Leon, mad cows doing the Harlem Shake is just the newest “Eat mor chiken” ad campaign from Chik-fil-a! Eat away!! (JK, we’re all going to have prion dz in 25 years).
What is w/all the tainted vegetables? Isn’t it common sense not to let hogs flush their toilets onto vegetable farms?
why dont you just make your own tacos? lol I’m sure homeade taco’s arent so bad…shoot..yer sexy…get you a puerto rican chick…show her leon jr. then you can haver her in the kitchen makin all that good spanish food!! see I’m a problem solver haha
* home made….what the hell is wrong with me when I type?
you know taco bell brings back memories. thats where we solidified our love for one another over burritos and bad singing!!!!
i ran for the border today. you knwo i love taco bell. chipotle is too fresh
Maybe you should try eating at Baja Fresh? You only end up with the Harlem Shake Guts only about half of the time.
*Backs away slowly*
I think Peach might be on to something Leon. I miss my cheesy, bean and rice burrito too! The only options we have here are Taco Bell and Chipotle and the last time I ate Chipotle I almost died (like literally had dysentery and thought I was going to die.) They sell the Taco Bell spices at the grocery. Might be time to whip out a skillet and get to dicing your own chicken LOL BTW Did the book make it?
Ummm, are Baja Fresh or Moe’s up there?
Or go to Columbia Heights and go to a burrito stand there. If you are going to get sick, at least get the authentic experience.
I agree with Peach. You lay the pipe right and she will be roasting a pig in your backyard just to make you some authentic sh*t!!! LOL
Just eat McDonalds.
Don’t go to the one is Adams Morgan though.
Boy stop, I ran for the border so much last week they revoked my passport. Even though it supposedly was the green onions, there HAS to be something else that gives people the toxic runs after every meal..I mean, I NEVER ate onions there and I’m still making a toilet run within five minutes of my number 6 without tomatos. Also, taco bell makes their little home kit, less grease, but still as good.
Aw, poor Leon. Happy B-day to your ma-dukes on Thursday (same b-day as mine…yaaayyyyy!)
You know what? I’m going to print out your entry and post it on my fridge when I need a good laugh…carrot juice lethal??? You’re too much!
Uh, Peach, don’t you mean Mexican chick? Tonta…LOL
It was a mix up it’s not Taco Bell thats making ppl sick its Taco John…there low budget counterparts….so it’s safe to eat at Taco Bell Whoo Whoo!
Wow, I just had this thought yesterday, as I went searching through my pockets and the depths of my purse to scrounge up 2 dollars. And I wondered where I could go with my measly $2 to fulfill the growling within my tummy. Normally, I’d hit up the local TB. But being that I live in Long Island, and my neighborhood TB was one that got shut down a week back, I was faced with the realization that I may never fully enjoy those delectable bean burritos again. *sigh* Needless to say, I ended up at 7-11, which I’m sure is due for an E Coli break out any day now…….I feel your pain, my brotha.
@Anonymous, um…puerto rican women make taco’s too…they are spanish
@Anonymous, um…puerto rican women make taco’s too…they are spanish
@Anonymous, um…puerto rican women make taco’s too…they are spanish
@Anonymous, um…puerto rican women make taco’s too…they are spanish
@Anonymous, um…puerto rican women make taco’s too…they are spanish
@Anonymous, um…puerto rican women make taco’s too…they are spanish
@Anonymous, as far as I know, Puerto Ricans are also spanish…and if my memory serves me … the also cook spanish food…might even also cook tacos!!
OMG leon i dont know why the hell that happend…but now i look like a total asshole im sorry!!
Leon…learn to cook man. Stay away from that fast food mess. People not washing their hands after using the bathroom or wiping their damned noses before they make your burger or taco…..
I say throw down in the kitchen, saves money, tastes better and it won’t kill ya.
I can’t do Taco Hell. That loose meat fucks with a sista’s stomach.
This is a messed up situation. I can’t afford to go all the way down to South Broadway when I want some tacos and such. Almost makes me wish I lived on the west coast.
Makes you want to NOT eat out anywhere.
I told ya’ll it wasnt the onions!
http://www.mercurynews.com/mld/mercurynews/news/breaking_news/16233315.htm
I knew lettuce was nasty..I KNEW IT!Tiara
Wait, what?
This is what I get for not watching the news, reading the news or reading your blog for two days. I actually ate in Taco Bell today for the first time in a year. So this is why the lady looked at me like I was crazy for wanting lettuce on my bean burrito.
Leon, am I gonna die?
Agrees with 1969. Fast food is highly processed.
Eat organic.
:-) Happy B-Day to your ma-dukes (and to meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!)
LOL@Peach
Craaaazy? Deraaaanged? lol
I was typing in the verification thing and it kept saying I typed it in wrong and it wasnt going through…well it finally did and so did all the other attempts!! damn it.
Saw this and had to come back and find this blog entry:
David Letterman’s Top Ten:
Questions To Ask Yourself Before Eating At Taco Bell
10. “Are my affairs in order?”
9. “Why is the counter kid wearing a hazmt suit?”
8. “Will the hot sauce kill the bacteria?”
7. “Is this how they poisoned that Russian spy?”
6. “Do I really want to succumb to a taco-related death?”
5. “Should I go somewhere safer for lunch like Fallujah?”
4. “Will this help me meet the recommended E.coli daily
requirement?”
3. (No number 3 — writer ate a bad chalupa)
2. “What would Kristie Alleyy do?”
1. “Wait — when was Taco Bell not tainted with E.coli?”