Happy Mother’s Day to all of the mothers out there. Despite all the jokes in the previous entry, I have the utmost respect for mothers and all fo the things that they endure. To my Mom and Grandma, I love you both. Thank you for everything that you’ve done for me, and for all of the love that you have given. To all of my readers with children, enjoy your day, and remember that Leon cares :)
Now that the sentimental stuff is out of the way, I have to give a shout out to the man of the hour: Pootie from Burger King. Last night, I went to this Burger King with my boy “Lotto”(the guy who signs “play lotto” after his comments) and his nephew Chris. When we entered the place, Chris looks over at the guy behind the counter and says “What’s up Pootie! Can I have a cup so I can go get some water.”
I looked at the man’s name tag, and it indeed said “Pootie.” Pootie gave Chris the jumbo size cup, and took my order. He then gave me a jumbo cup as well, and I noticed that he didn’t type anything into the register. After I walked over and fixed my drink, I went over to Chris and said “Is your boy giving me the hookup or something? He didn’t even put anything through the register?”
Chris said “I have no idea. I just read his name tag and spoke to him. I’ve never seen him before in my life.”
Almost immediately after he said this, Pootie walked to the register with my food and said “Go on man, you’re good.” He didn’t have to tell me twice. I was out the door in less than three seconds.
For about the next 10 minutes, Lotto, Chris and I debated theories to explain the mysterious Pootie Hookup. The first one was that Pootie was gay and had a thing for one of us, but that theory was more of a joke.The second theory was that it was probably Pootie’s last day and he simply did not give a damn anymore about his job. While that seemed to make sense, we pretty much came to consensus on the last theory. The theory that Pootie must have thought that he met Chris somewhere before, but since he did not remember him, so he gave us the hookup in order to save face and avoid awkward conversation. That theory also requires Pootie to have forgotten that he had on a name tag that read “Pootie”, but it was plausible.
To Pootie, I thank you for the six bucks you saved me yesterday. You will never be forgotten, my service industry friend. As a matter of fact, next time I come to that Burger King, I’m going to the front and asking “Is Pootie working?” If your boss reads this and tries to fire you, let me know. I’ll tell him that I was talking about another Pootie working at another Burger King in another state. You can’t be the only “Pootie” in the entire Burger King corporation.
My last tribute is to the man who for years had the meanest jheri curl shag in R&B. The man who raised Paris Hilton’s best friend/worst eneme/whatever they are now. One of the greatest love song singers of all time…Lionel Richie! This tribute was filmed at The Reef Happy Hour, and it is a live performance of one of the tunes I covered on my debut album, “Music To Dry-Hump Your Lady To.” You’ll have to excuse the dark lighting. My cameraman did not know how to cut on the light feature on the camera. Also, excuse the bad singing. Blame that all that ‘yak I was sippping on ALL NIGHT LONG!
Once again, Happy Mother’s/Grandmother’s/Lionel Richie/Pootie Day!
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Please God, dont ever do that again, ever.
The world thanks you!
:)
L
Finally! That was soooo bad, Leon! Next time, show ya boy how to use the light feature! LMAO @ the part where he says “Go over there…by the fishtank- there’s light over there.” hahahaha! Youse a ghetto ass if I ever seen one!
Oh how i have been waiting for this footage..gotta love the background comments/singing too! LOL
Haha.. Leon, first time round it sounded like you said “we gonna party, [inaudible mumble], fiesta, forever”
No offence if it’s my ears that’s mulfunctioning and not your singing, but that 2nd word is ‘Karamu’, swahili for party.
I’m still salty I didn’t get any food. You don’t know how tempted I was to say “in that case let me get a number 2″. LOL!!!
Big Ups to Pootie we love you!!
NO HOMO!!! LOL!!!
Play Lotto, no really Play Lotto!!!!
@ Lola gets, I’m doing it again, dammit! I’ll just warn you next time.
@ Tiana Danielle, yeah, that was kind of ghetto, wasn’t it?
@ Leigh, the crowd was into my bad singing!
@ Sitati K, I said something different each time! I think the first time I said “Bacardi” the second time I said “hardy” and after that, I either read “karamu” on the screen, or just mumbled! Thanks for telling me what it means
@ Play Lotto, I forgot “No homo” was the first words that dude heard when Chris walked through the door! Pootie is the Man of the Hour!
Yo man, there are no words for how incredibly bad your singin is, but my favorite part was the litany of “somethin, somethin, somethin, somethin, why aren’t the words on the screen?” I think I amlost choked laughing at your foolishness lmao.
Ha Ha when i come to DC we got to do a duet. lmao….
oye ve…!
HUHlarious. HOW have i survived so long w/o your blog. POOTIE?!?! why do they let people do that? i’ve never worked anywhere where they made me wear a name tag but geez. this girl at panera bread had the nerve to call herself “synamin.” yeah right. your mama has that spice in her cabinet. there is no amount of creativity to come up with that spelling. i think pootie’s manager just pissed him off that day.
Lawd, I thought someone had trapped a cat in a blender. Leon, next time just sway to the music. Don’t sing.
Pootie?! For real?! I wonder if Mookie was working in the back on the grille. Too funny! (When you have a second, take a look at my site. I’ve nominated you!)
LOL… that was TOO funny…WOW, I don’t know…I was going for option #1…but they’re all good thoughts to ponder. nice page.
lol….Pootie is the man…I think he was quitting and just didn’t care..I’m come into many free food hook ups that way..oh and the usual way where someone thinks you’re cute happens also..
Every transaction is an opportunity for a hook up. I’ve found if you smile, speak, and are friendly to the person selling the goods, a hook up of some sort is likely to occur. Free combs at Sally’s, extra fries at McDonald’s….it’s all about attitude.