Last week, a friend of mine convinced me to check out the new show, “Rock of Love” on VH1. I did, and I must say, I actually enjoyed it. Not because of the gratuitous amount of silicone breasts getting camera time(although that didn’t hurt), but because of the antics. One episode of this show almost single-handedly made up for “Flavor of Love”, “I Love New York”, and “Charm School” altogether. My friends, there is nothing better than white coonery.
First off, let me define the word “coon” for those unfamiliar with the term. The Dictionary definition is Slang: Disparaging and Offensive. A black person. The unofficial definition used among black people is someone who acts like a buffoon or sellout, usually with stereotypical or over-the top antics, reminicient of minstrel shows. ex. Cuba Gooding Jr.
There, now you know what a coon is, so you can use your reasoning skills to figure out that when I use terms like cooning and coonery, it refers to behavior that gets a person labeled in such a way. That said, it was plenty of cooning going on in the first episode of “Rock of Love.” This made me happy, because up until now, VH1 has been raking in untold fortunes by putting the almost all-black ladies of “Flavor of Love” on TV and giving them a public stage to make jackasses of themselves. Not that I don’t enjoy it, because I do. It’s a guilty pleasure. I have watched every “Flavor of Love” related spinoff, except for “I Love New York.” There are three reasons why I did not watch that show:
1.) I can’t stand New York’s voice. Her shrill, high-pitched tone is the sound I would imagine a poodle would make if you stepped on it’s balls.
2.) As much as New York’s voice irritates me, the site of her mother is even more disturbing. That woman looks like the Bride of Satan.
3.) I can’t watch any show where grown men play themselves and help boost the ego of a woman who is already having all kinds of crazy delusions of grandeur. Since the likelihood of someone breaking her down, or shaking her one good time while yelling “B*TCH SHUT THE F*CK UP!” was pretty low, I could not bring myself to watch.
Luckily, “Rock of Love” came along and proved to the ignorant folks who believe everything that they see, that white people can coon just as hard as black people, sometimes, much harder. Between the abundance of attention-starved strippers in the house, and the chick who was drunk half of the show, it made for some very entertaining televison, in a lowest common denominator kind of way. The woman who did not know her alcohol limits actually went through all of the stages of drunk-ass, right in front of the camera. She went from “Let’s party” drunk, to slutty drunk, to angry drunk, to overly emotional drunk, to ”I can’t walk straight” drunk, to “Reality is starting to set back in” drunk. She even proved to be a trendsetter, because I catch myself saying “Don’t threaten me with a good time” now, thanks to the fact that she kept on uttering the phrase.
Overall, I enjoyed the show. Brett Michaels appears to be the type of guy that I probably would have been if I were an 80′s rock star who gets pantydraws thrown at me left and right. Since I’m merely a blogger who only occasionally gets pantydraws thrown at me, I really cannot totally relate to the guy, but he seems like someone I would invite to a party or go out drinking with. Factor in a house full of females trying to, for lack of a better term, throw their pantydraws at him, and you’ve got yourself a TV show that is bound to be millions of people’s guilty pleasure viewing. Here’s to white coonery!
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Mmmm I might have to catch this show when I am bored lounghing around the crib. White people coon just as hard as any others. They just dont show it as much. This would of been classic if they aired this show on BET LMAO
LOL at New York’s mom looking like the bride of Satan.
Oh yea..First muthafuckas!! (and second too)
Um. OK. I tell ya, this decade in retrospect…ugh!
Btw, whites will never be viewed as “coons” but white trash….ok, lets see how many so called white cooning show will catch up to the number of black cooning shows…
WL :)
oh, and THIZIRD b******s!
i love this new show! more than i loved Charm School and Flavor of Love. And yes, the reason is because it shows white folks acting an ass. Next week they are gonna fight….A LOT. more than they did on FOL. It’s equality at its best.
But whats up with the ugly black chick thats still on the show? Not only is she ugly but she is weird. Damn, i KNOW that wasnt the only black chick they could book for the show.
“As much as New York’s voice irritates me, the site of her mother is even more disturbing. That woman looks like the Bride of Satan.”
*DEAD*
My ex ALWAYS said that she was the Devil…..lol.
LOL @ pantydraws…I don’t think I’ve heard that term used for a hot minute!
On a side note, what’s really IS with those black girls who were/are there…don’t they know heavy metal of the 80s was mostly for the good ole Confederate flag- flying, blonde haired, blue-eyed white guys who couldn’t give a damn whether or not we listened to their music?
I am surprised you didn’t touch on the Three 6 Mafia show on VH1. Juicy J and DJ Paul say some pretty crazy things. I’ll check out Rock of Love next time it comes on.
i thought the show was funny as hell.white people in general are funny lol
@tayeski: I still crack up out of no where remembering him saying “Sugarfoot” over and over!
@Jabari Talib: I still crack up out of no where remembering him saying “Sugarfoot” over and over!
Uh, that comment was at Jabari Talib. Sorry. **Going to hide in a corner now.**
Oddly enough, once the “n-word” was buried a couple of weeks ago me and my friends started saying “coon” as a replacement. This post is right on time.
I think I may check out that show. I honestly liked the Flavor of Love and all the spinoffs, though I agree with you on “I Love New York”. I hate her and she looks like Yoshi.
ex. Cuba Gooding Jr.
lmaoooooooooooo
you failed to mention the one black chick left in the house looks like a cartoon character- not cute- at all
my other guilty pleasure- scott baio is 45 and single… i watched it by accident but i actually like that show
yes diva527!! i’m glad i am not the only one who noticed that chick is the ugliest black chick in america…
I like the show too, to see them winches (I brought back winch from the 80′s to use instead of H* and B*tch) act out, you know when Brett who is the rocker of all rockers say this ish is out of control, them heffas were truly partying!
Rock of Love just screams Valtrex.
ROFLMAO@ Nikki – I hate every blogger I know. LMAO
You better recognize!!! That might be the one thing we learned from them!! How to drink and act a damn fool. LOL LMAO Please most reality shows were founded on crazy azz white folk drinking and making fools of themselves. It’s crazy how it still doesn’t level the playing field though right? LMAO
Okay on a sidenote… so… why… please tell me why… do I know one of the “Rock of Love”… what do you call them *cough* whores *cough* contestants? Cindy – or Rodeo – or whatever she’s going by on the show, is actually an acquaintance of mine and I know her fairly well. *shaking head* I am SO going to have to check out the show On Demand. But I’m afraid… I’m very afraid. LOL
@ Xquizzyt1, your aquaintence seems like one of the few that might actually have some sense…but it’s early in the season, so that all remains to been seen!
@ Nikki, I totally agree!!!
@Passion, True!
“Rock of Love” came along and proved to the ignorant folks who believe everything that they see, that white people can coon just as hard as black people, sometimes, much harder” is the reason i watch that show.
@ Jabari Talib , I’m from Memphis and even I crack up and SMH when I here some of the things they say on that show. I went to school with “Sugarfoot”, and she “wasn’t right” then either, LOL.
Yes but there was the one black chick who said “i just love the song ‘Every Thorn Has its Rose.’”
Yhanks youf93815
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