The show must go on. I am still feeling pretty sad upon hearing that Sean Taylor passed away this morning, succumbing to his gunshot wound. Even though I am not 100% on joke-time today, I realize that I do kind of provide a public service on this blog. The service of making people laugh to help get through their work day. That said, I’m going to say one last R.I.P., and get back to the usual order of business around these parts.
It takes one hell of a woman to convince me to buy a magazine without looking at a single page inside, strictly off the strength of her cover photo. Upon seeing the cover to the tech guide on this month’s Men’s Health, I realized that Dania Ramirez is without a doubt, indubitably, the shit.
Yeah, I said it. Indubitably. Go on and look it up.
The funny part is, I bought the book upon seeing the cover photo, then I read it and saw that she’s engaged. I’m almost ashamed to admit it, but my first thoughts upon reading the news was “THAT SELFISH BITCH!” Call me unrealistic…Call me self-centered…but learning that the likelihood of Dania and I ever having sex is slim-to-none caused me to have a slight player-hater moment. My mackin’ is back in perspective now. Congratulations Dania Ramirez. If you know Lauren London, tell her I said to call me.
Speaking of calling and contacting me, it’s about that time, muhf*ckas. If you can honestly claim any of the following statements to be true:
- You know me in real life
- You’re in the DC area and you’re good-looking
- You are immediate family, or distant relative(if distant, let me know just in case #2 applies to you, so that there are no West Virginia backwoods disasters that we’ll have to take to the grave with us)
- You have home-training, and you’re cool with buying me alcohol with no promise of having the favor returned
- We’ve randomly gotten drunk together, and there were no fisticuffs
- You’re those cute ladies I ran into in Adams Morgan who talked about having a threesome with me
Please write to HustlemanL77@yahoo.com and send me your e-mail address. I’m celebrating my birthday in style this year since I’m crossing the old-school line(30), so if you would like to be included in the weekend intenerary, send me an e-mail.
Also, I want to make a public apology to Leon from Leonsays.blogspot.com since we spoke on the phone, but I never got bak to him about hanging out. I was tired as hell from putting up my mom’s Christmas decorations, and by the time I did anything on Friday, I figured it was too late. My bad, bro. If I make a trip to your neck of the woods, I owe you a drink, good sir.
THAT SELFISH BITCH… LMAO. Maybe she’s not being selfish, but she just doesn’t know that there’s a Leon out there that spent $4.50 on her. You should probably reach out to her and see what happens. Then blog about, because I always need a good laugh.
Ah, yes, Dania…that DOMINICAN (had to throw that in there LOL) goddess from Heroes… one of the VERY FEW women for whom I’d switch teams. Others include a pre-engaged Salma Hayek (she lost some major points by procreating with that gross French guy) and a brunette Janeane Garofalo (she looks TERRIBLE with blonde hair).
have I shared too much…was that TMI?? *goes to store to buy Men’s Health*
LOL
How dare that bitch have a life and follow her heart, what about you!
Penelope Cruz, that’s who you need to be looking for!
How come ugly women aren’t invite to your party?
lol…you are a mess!
“You’re in the DC area and you’re good-looking”…SMH & LOL!!!
psssssssst…I heard Lauren London is engaged and knocked up on the low. j/k!
When is your birthday?
Tsk Tsk…How soon the “wang worries” fade…
Found a barber yet?
indubitably is one of my favorite words. i say that shit like im english and everything lol
oh yea, and alot of hollywood is hella unfaithful, keep hope alive sir. lol
happy early birthday and what not. and speaking of calling niggas back. wasnt we suppose to talk about something at some point? my bad lol.
sadly i wasnt sober during that convo i dont think. but now that i think about it, i dont think you were either lol. i just remember laughin lol.
RIP Sean Taylor.
It’s cool bruh. I was so tired from going all the way out to Fairfax AND Tyson’s Corner battling the Black Friday crowds, and getting out there from my Aunt’s house in Maryland and back, by the time I got back, I was down for the count myself.
Besides, I didn’t have my car with me, so it would’ve been kind of hard to explain to my parents that I needed to borrow their truck to meet my online friends.
But yeah, when you come to my neck of the woods, hit me up!
First time here, via Minerva. I like the reads. I’ll have to return. Keep up the good work.
Oh, and welcome to the dark side! 30 is the new 20 (F*ck I feel old for even saying that.)
LOL, 20 is still the new 20 :P (having just turned 20 myself, I’m sort of enjoying it) but 30 is cool too!
They got me too on that Men’s Health. I walked past that joint twice just trying to make sure I was seeing what I thought I was seeing. Dania Ramirez is so fiyah right now.
Another Leon huh? We’re all over the place! Ms. (soon to be Mrs.) Ramirez is indeed hot. Hush man.
@ Leon, we really do need to form a coalition. Like Cobra from G.I. Joe! Instead of taking over the world, we can take over the blogosphere! I can be Cobra Commander, you can shave your head, paint it silver, and be Destro. Then we’ll put LeoninATL in ninja school so he can be Storm Shadow!
I’m really a geek for remembering all the GI Joe characters like I do.
@ Skoolboi Krush, Glad I’m not alone. That cover stopped me in my tracks!
@ aleis, so true! thanks
@ BZ, thanks
@ Leon, cool. I’ll let you know.
@ O.com, I forgot to call you back. It’s MY fault lol. I’ll be in touch soon. Thanks
@ common Share, making that decision soon.
@ Carib Queen, she’s not having sex with me, so it doesn’t count!
Ok…I’m too lazy to respond to the rest. F*ck it. Love ‘yall!
Oh she’s WICKED…