It’s black Friday again. this time, it’s Black Friday, because all this week, I’ve been hearing about numerous celebrities that I had aspirations of someday laying the pipe to, getting engaged. First it was Dania Ramirez. Then Lauren London. Today, I read that Jessica Love Hewitt is getting married too. What the hell is going on here?!
I’ll tell you what it is…Celebrities started reading this blog. They KNEW I was coming, so they started hand-cuffing their hoes. Don’t they know this tactic is an excercise in futility?! It’s like when kids in the 1950s were told to hide under their desk with their hands over their heads if an atomic bomb hits. Like that cruddy little cheap public school desk and two little-assed kid-hands are really going to save them.
Lil’ Wayne is actually in DC this weekend, performing at H2O. I know Little Duffle Bag Boy knows better than to bring Lauren to a town where she’ll be within a 10 mile radius of my swagger, so I’m going to spend my Friday partying for two different charities instead of going there to break up a rich guy/trophy wife understanding happy home. Besides, I’m not going to be one of those people saying stuff like “Why is she with that little tatted-up, thugged-out leprechaun?” Lil’ Wayne is making money hand over foot. He’s supposed to be getting all kinds of ass! A fine woman is included with every Young Rich Guy starter kit. Go to hotchickswithdouchebags.com if you don’t believe me.
If Lil’ Wayne married a woman in his leauge as far as looks go, the same people talking about him marrying Lauren London would make fun of him for having an ugly wife. Hell, some of the same women making fun of his looks, would get star-struck and turn into groupies if he walked into the same room as them. Basically, people are hypocrites, you can’t please everybody, and it’s better to marry up than down.
So Lil Wayne, if you’re reading this, I hope your show goes well, and congratulations my brother.
*Mumbling to myself*
“Don’t leave your girl ’round me”
Tweet
that Sagittarius swagger is killer dude. New New better watch out!
hand-cuffing their hoes? WOW!! The sound bites I get from this blog…can’t wait to use this one LOL
amvio;ejpriuwnhpfzbva;klcjnvl
That was me throwing up at the thought of Lauren marrying that little troll. I don’t follow celebrity news or personal lives. So, I didn’t know they were together. Damn. I don’t claim to be on the same plane, by appearance, as Lauren London. But I don’t care how much money you have. If you’re that ugly with nasty ass teeth, you gets nathan! If I can’t picture you in the bed, I can’t picture you with me at all. LOL
Um, Im sorry about your loss of accessability to these women…I think…?? Anywho, you have a good birthday!
L
For some reason I am not surprised, but of course this is Hollywood so they’ll never make it to within 6 months of an actual wedding. Rappers and actresses??? yeah that goes together perfectly.
In the meantime, I guess Sipperhead aka Superspermrecepticle aka Superheadgiver is somewhere contemplating suicide. Have at it heffa…
Happy Bday, and because I’m broke, and you’re a little sad about these chicks, here you go: *flashes ( * )( * ) for two seconds…* lmao.
And I know your not going to let a little engagement ring stop your quest for these women. Dust off your tape deck and find that I Got a Man tape and get some inspiration.
what !!!! Lauren London is engaged to Wayne………awww hell nahhhhhhh
@ Radio Raheem, I’m still waiting to hear that it’s just a rumor…That’s why I hate celebrity gossip sites. I better not have gotten all worked up for nothing!
@ Marleaux, thank you for fhashing your e-titties at me. Very sexy ;) I’m going to go buy Positive K’s album right now!
@ Roycee, thank you for being a beacon of optimism ;) Then again, I really don’t want to hit it now that I know that Lil’ Wayne has. It’s almost like she’s damaged good or something…
@ Lola, thank you! I won’t ask you to let me teabag you now, thanks to the well-wishes!
@ BZ, that’s hilarious
@ TQB, I got that one from Snoop originally!
@ Mr 6’5″, it’s birthday week! if New New is in town, New New is getting her back blown out! LOL
Happy Birthday, Leon! Hey well…you still got Laurie Ann Gibson…LOL (sorry!)
*high fives Roycee for that comment*
I thought I was the only one thinking that!!
I know how you feel. I stalked Tom Welling for 6 months (yeah I know…him of all people) and then found out he was married. I’m still a little traumatized but haven’t given up on the idea of having lil Clark Kents running around my house. If his wife allows I’ll def. settle for being his concubine. I’m really and totally in love with Superman….Yooooooou!
Haha! Marriage: 1, Leon: 0. Don’t blame the rich douchebags. These beautiful women are also to blame ’cause they push up on them.
Happy Birthday Leon!
Happy Birthday Leon! That swagger is definitely the mark of a sagittarian ;)
“In the meantime, I guess Sipperhead aka Superspermrecepticle aka Superheadgiver is somewhere contemplating suicide. Have at it heffa…”
*Dead*
Yeah, I heard weezy was puttin’ it to Superhead. She was all up in some magazine (Vibe I think) talking about how this ni**a got her open. And had the nerve to say that she could count the number of times they “made love” on one hand. What’s that about?
Why does Karrine always say that shit?!?! In all her stupid books, she cops out about “making love” with DMX, Ray J, Bobby Brown, Ja Rule, Murder Inc, etc etc!! They arent making LOVE TO YOU HO!!! I wish her stupid editor would make her correct that shit.