Two Empty Seats At Rush Hour
Posted by ListenToLeon on
December 17, 2007
I just might be a little paranoid. I came to this realization on the metro train this morning on my way to work. I got on the infamous Green Line, and saw that there were not one, but two empty seats available, right near me. Upon viewing the empty seats nearby during rush hour, my immediate thought was “OK. This is too good to be true. It must have been some really smelly, disgusting, hideously deformed vagrant with leprocy sitting here earlier. It has to be a reason why people are treating these seats as if a radioactive chemical spill had recently occured there.”
Then, as I got closer, I noticed that there was no lingering stench in the area. The seats also appeared clean. Well, as clean as expected for a seat on public transportation. That’s when I decided to just sit down and chalk it up as the result of being in the right place at the right time. If my left arm turns green and falls off tonight, then I’ll see that I did sit in the chair directly after a really smelly, disgusting, hideously deformed vagrant with leprocy. If not, then it was a stroke of good fortune!
Before I end this entry, I need to announce that I have reformatted the Greatest Hits page, and added some new entries to it, along with a collection of the funniest stuff from my King Magazine online column and The Insensitive News Syndicate site. Let me know what you think about the way I broke the entries up into categories, and also feel free to suggest the entries that you think are classics and should be added. You know I love getting feedback, whether good, bad or ugly!
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8 Responses to “Two Empty Seats At Rush Hour”
“Then, as I got closer, I noticed that there was no lingering stench in the area. The seats also appeared clean.”
NIce move, Leon, this exactly what the white broad does in horror movies right before she gets axed..movin’ in closer to the scene in question! LOL
The Curious George post is a classic!
By Wonderlove on Dec 17, 2007
By the way, FIRST!!!
By Wonderlove on Dec 17, 2007
LOL @ this story. The metro up in DC seems to be always crowded whenever I visit up there. MARTA (here in ATL) isn’t much better though, but they don’t even go everywhere you need to be.
By leoninatl on Dec 17, 2007
There’s a Greatest Hits section yet you never released the Dry Humpin’ on Your Mama’s Couch compilation?
By Wonderlove on Dec 17, 2007
@ Wonderlove, I’m re-recording the album, with superproducer Lugz doing most of the tracks(I couldn’t afford Timbaland)
By Hustleman on Dec 17, 2007
I do the same thing when I notice empty seats that no one wants to sit in because…well…you just never know.
Not too long ago, there were some empty seats for good reason on my train – they were wet. But did the young girl who plopped down in to the seat look before she sat…nope. She immediately jumped back up, touched her wet pants and then smelled her fingers…to her surprise that yellow liquid was not juice or dirty water. YUCK!!!
Ahhhhhh you gotta luv riding the train in NY…always something interesting going on.
By Opinionated Diva on Dec 17, 2007
@Opinionated Diva-ewwww NY trains! I once too the train at 2 a.m. and noticed a homeless dude chokin’ his chicken…a few minutes later, I noticed jizz runnin down his hand as he touched the pole to get himself up to then exit the train….
By Wonderlove on Dec 17, 2007
I hate it when good things seem to good to be true.
By Jabari Talib on Dec 17, 2007