DC Vendor Justice
Posted by ListenToLeon on
July 3, 2008
I am the victim of vigilante justice.
Don’t get me wrong…It’s nowhere near as bad as that murder suspect who got killed while in solitary confinemint in Prince Geroge’s County, MD earlier this week. I guess the fact that I’m here to type this story proves that it’s nowhere near as serious. Hell, my story doesn’t even involve actual law enforcement. My story is about my chance encounter with a street vendor in DC, and her use of treachery.
I was in Northwest DC the other day, and I decided that I felt like buying a soda from one of the street vendors. Once the lady at the little stand told me the cost of the beverage, I gave her a $20 bill. Then this exchange happened:
Vendor Lady: “You don’t have change?”
Me: “No. Sorry.”
Her: *Shaking her head*
Me: “You know, if you don’t have change, just give me my $20 back. I can just go to another vendor up the street or something. It’s no problem…”
Her: “NO! NO! I have your change! Hold on.”
I knew had change. She had to have change! It was right around lunchtime in downtown DC. Not having change at this crucial point in the day is bad for business.
Instead of getting my change, the vendor lady proceeded to help the guy in line behind me. After getting his hot dog, she reached in her back pocket and pulled out a big wad of cash. I thought to myself, “This woman just acted like getting change was this huge deal, but all the while she had a drug-dealer roll stuffed in her back pocket! What the Hell is that all about?”
That’s when I realized that she just didn’t want to reach in her back pocket and make change. She made me wait as punishment for making her do simple math! She even went so far as to say that she had to give me $3 in quarters. I said to her “I saw all those ones in your hand…but I’m going to the laundromat anyway, so go on and give me the quarters. Why are you stingy on the ones and fives? You going to the strip-club after work or something?”
She kind of looked away and blushed with a smile…so I don’t know. Maybe she thought I was flirting. Or maybe she really was going to the strip club. Either way, I had to let her know in a nice way, that I knew she just lied to my face. I should have stopped by The House last night…That way, if I could have checked to see if that vendor lady was next to the stage making it rain on some big booty strippers or something. Then I could yell out “I KNEW IT!” and walk right out the door.
Technorati Tags: vigilante justice, street vendors, DC, strip-club, The House
8 Responses to “DC Vendor Justice”
Then I could yell out “I KNEW IT!” and walk right out the door.
WHY can I see you doing that!?!?! LMAO
By MissJay on Jul 3, 2008
Sucka.
By anonymousnupe on Jul 3, 2008
LOL. this is random semi-uninteresting (and partly disgusting) but everytime i go to home depot, i get a hot dog from the stand outside — they are BANGINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNnn!!!!
even when i lived in california they were…
ick.
By allienicole on Jul 3, 2008
@ allienicole…I used to go to the Target in Potomac Yards during lunch just for their hot dogs. I think they were pepper or something. Damn they were good!
Leon, you going tonite? You should shoot a video for the site.
By kayellejaye on Jul 3, 2008
@ Kayellejaye, I am going. That’s a good idea about the video…I may enlist you as a cameraperson. We’ll talk tonight about getting you the bottle that you won, too.
@ Allienicole, that’s funny, but I totally believe you. I’ve heard people talk about getting them from outside the Home Depot in Silver Spring.
@ MissJay, that’s because you know that i really would do it!
@ Anonymousnupe, I haven’t seen that clip in years!!!
By Hustleman on Jul 3, 2008
Good day!,
By name on Aug 31, 2008
Hello!,
By name on Sep 1, 2008