Happy Thanksgiving everyone. I intended to post something earlier today, but since it’s Thanksgiving Day, and I am at my grandma’s house, that most stereotypically black of syndromes set in: “The ‘Itis”
Also known as the NENS, which stands for N*gga eat, n*gga sleep. Turkey is the second best natural sedative in existence. Late night sex is the only more satisfying and enjoyable way to be rendered unconscious.
I just want to take a moment to say thank you to all of you out there reading ListenToLeon.net. It’s been one rollercoaster ride of a year, full of highs and lows. Everything from losing my father, to gaining a long-lost sister. This site has won awards, gotten me writing jobs, probably cost me other writing jobs I went after, and gotten me press coverage(good and bad).
You guys have been there through it all, and I definitely appreciate it. Happy Thanksgiving.
Dude, you website has given me so much joy. I wish you much happiness.
My wife and I made our holiday plans. We are spending Thanksgiving with my family where pleasant fellowship, love, joy and giving fill the air. But…we’re spending Christmas with her people. Or as I call it:
THE HOUSE OF DYSFUNCTION
Half her cousins are in jail and the other half should be. Dinner at their house is considered a success when no one catches a bullet.
Well…it’s not that bad but after I ask one of them how they’ve been, I get so tired of EVERY story starting out with, “Dude, the Po-po set me up man. What had happened was…”
I just hope her crack-head brother forgets what day it is and doesn’t stop by the house. I mentioned this to my wife and she had the nerve to get indignant by saying that I knew he was clean.
Really? By being clean did she mean hygiene-wise or off that rock? Last time I saw him, he was a hot mess. He smelled like a combination of warm garbage, spoiled milk, and cat shit. And was he ASHY! If a tanker spilled some oil, you could just throw him on the spill because his dry ass skin would suck up the oil slick.
The only useful thing I’ve learned from him, (besides learning to spot skeezers and undercover cops) is how to stab someone. Before I met him, I thought you just stuck the knife in and then pulled it out. Nope.
You stick it in, jerk it up, slash to the right, and then pull it out. That way you’re bound to slice a major organ. So when the victim goes down, he stays down. Apparently this is important, because your opponent can still kill you if he’s got just a stab wound. But if his kidney is lacerated, he sort of loses his motivation to keep fighting.
Anyway,
HAVE A HAPPY HOLIDAY!
Thanks for the compliment…And you better hope that your wife’s gangsta ass relatives aren’t computer literate! Especially the crackhead brother with the knowledge of proper stabbing technique! LOL
I typed LOL, but for real, I’m thinking to myself “I hope I never piss your brother in law off one day!”
Happy Turkey day Leo. Glad your blog has done wonders for your life. I know mine has.
I’m late but I hope your turkey day was nice.
Thank You! for entertaining us and the sacrifices..