Apparently, the DC City Council is considering banning the sale of jumbo slice pizza. Jim Graham and his cohorts believe that outlawing the sale of single slice pizza will help stop some of the violence that occurs late nights in Adams Morgan by drunken party crowds. Personally, I believe it is a ridiculous idea that is only going to lead to more violence, because instead of just being drunk and horny, the 3AM folks on the street will now be drunk, horny and hungry: A much more lethal combination!
Let’s not make late night pizza shops the scapegoat for all of the craziness going on in that neighborhood on Friday and Saturday nights. I think there are a number of contributing factors. Many people in the young crowds attracted to the Adams Morgan nightlife just cannot handle their liquor, and partying in that part of town is usually cheaper than most other areas in the city. Trust me, I’ve had more than my share of sh*t-face drunk evenings out there, so I am an expert on this.
On top of that, it’s about as come-as-you-are as you’re going to get in DC. Very few bars out there charge a cover, and it’s rare that a place in Adams Morgan will turn you away because of the way you’re dressed. If that happens, it means you’re either wearing something that could get you arrested for indecent exposure, or your fashion sense is just f*cked up beyond all repair.
Think about the elements for a second: People are drunk. They’re not in their “good clothes” so they’re not worried about messing them up. It’s pretty much one big ass street, with people traveling in hordes from one direction to the other. Eventually, something’s gotta give. It usually gives around 3:30 AM once the bars are closed and people are leaving and/or trying to get that last-second phone number on the street.
Not one time did a damn jumbo slice enter the equation! LEAVE MY DRUNKEN JUNK FOOD ALONE, DC!!! It’s not going to stop any fights. All it’s going to do is make drunk people get in their cars sooner and drive around in search of food, when they could at least get themselves together enough to make it home(in most cases) after stopping for some food and letting the grease “absorb the alcohol” as any drunken pseudo-scientist would claim.
Jim Graham, Adrian Fenty, Marion Barry, Vincent Gray, and the rest of y’all, please take this into consideration when you vote on the matter. If not, I’m going to get vendor space in one of the old jumbo slice places, and create a pimp-themed restaurant called . I’ll even name all my food after pimp terms. Filet-O-Bitch fish sandwich. Chocolate Milkshakethemtitties. You get the idea. That will be my act of protest!
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Chocolate Milshakethemtitties?????? Really?? LMAO
Yeah that’s some bullsh*t right there…Jumbo slice does not equal trigger happy people!!!
what kinda trash is this? jumbo slice doesn’t cause the problems. it actually saves the night. instead of waiting in the long ass diner line, i just hit the slice next to the diner and boom. i’m satisfied.
true, i’ve seen so many heads caved in at that jumbo slice alone, and for the most part it’s a drunk white guy who gets loose lips and *bam* he’s done for. but if anything, they should get some more late night food places. actually, that wouldn’t help.
and, “If that happens, it means you’re either wearing something that could get you arrested for indecent exposure, or your fashion sense is just f*cked up beyond all repair.”
cot damn. ain’t that the truth.
Whaaaa….? That truly makes no sense. Pizza is the only thing that’s holding this city together!
So instead on banning alcohol to stop drunken fights. He wants to ban sobering greasy food. Where the hell is Marion Berry, is he still in jail?
Pimpin aint easy but somebody’s gotta do it! Milkshakethemtitties! Haha!
thats so azz backwards SMH…….
Banning jumbo slice pizza to stop violence = truly one of the most profoundly retarded ideas in the history of mankind.
*wiping the tears away* LMAO
This is ridiculous. I can only imagine the backlash here in Philly if they tried to close Lorenzo’s down on South Street.
Hungry, horny and drunk is my typical afternoon, so I know how stressful it is.
Good to meet another DC native on the blogosphere.
Now onto the heart of the matter. Adams Morgan has become increasingly violent and it just goes to show the clear lack of self-control that folks have. It’s one thing to drink and get drunk and it’s another thing to create mass disruption while being drunk. Banning slices of pizza is definitely not going to reduce crime so perhaps they should find another way!