Last week, I saw this beautiful young lady walking with her friends. When I say she was “beautiful” let me put what I’m talking about into perspective. She was so good looking, I remember that face a week later and now I’m writing a blog about it!
Now that we’ve established that she’s attractive, let me get to the part that has me wondering if something is wrong with me. I realized that she looks similar to someone I used to go out with. She was a little bit prettier than my ex lady, and the ex had her beat in the ass department…but that’s neither here nor there. I just want to know if it’s strange for me to be that attracted to someone who looks like a woman that I previously dated?
I know what you’re probably thinking: “That’s probably just the type of woman that you’re into.” However, anyone who knows me, knows that I only have one physical type, and that’s “pretty.”
I’ve dated all kinds of women, from:
- Short women to tall women.
- Petite women, to women who weigh more than me, but carry it well(can’t be with a big girl who looks sloppy or can overpower me. Gotta draw the line somewhere)
- Around the way girls to ladies from countries most people can’t find on a map.
- Almost every race, religion, skin tone, hair type and eye color you can imagine.
I know number four wasn’t super specific, but you know what I mean. I know some jackass is going to be extra literal in the comments section and ask something like “What about bald head albino midgets from Pakistan? Did you date one of those?
For the record, no. No, I have not. So consider this a pre-emptive “Shut ‘cho dumb ass up” and continue reading.
My self diagnosis is that certain qualities can be attractive on more than one woman. If I loved the old girl’s smile, it kind of makes sense that I like the lookalike’s smile just as much. The only time it kind of gets “different” is if I’m watching porn. Most of the smut that actually turns me on features women who remind me of someone I used to have sex with, I’m currently having sex with, or I wanted to have sex with, but didn’t.
The funny thing about smut is the more you watch, the less likely you are to do the things you see in the video with a real woman. Remember that, folks. IT’LL MAKE YOU GO BLIND!
That said, when I do look at that stuff, those are the women I like to watch do unGodly things on film. I have 20-20 vision, so I’m good. DON’T JUDGE ME!
Seriously, I want to know what you all think about being turned on by someone who looks like someone you used to date. Let’s call it the Theory of Attractive Similarity.
I met a guy once who looked like an older version of my first love. My first love and I were together nearly 10 years, even had a child. So when I started to like the new guy I started noticing just how much he reminded me of the ex and I got scared. From the way he smiled, the way he walked, his sense of humor, to the shape of his hands & nails…he looked like he could be my ex’s older brother. Scared me so much, I ran away. I regret it to this day but it’s kinda an eery feeling to like someone who reminds you so much of your ex. You wanna move past it but some stuff can’t be ignored.
Pretty much like the song “Usher – You Remind Me”.
It dawned on me late in life that I actually do have a preference, albeit not an overwhelming one since I too have been with all types. With regard to the look of a woman who really does it for me, it turns out I’m most attracted to darker complexions, short hair, and good muscle tone (especially taut calves). This pretty much describes Mrs. Nupe perfectly, so that’s a good thing. But I still most admire random women cut from that same cloth when they cross my path, so they all tend to have at least a passing resemblance to my Queen.
I realized that I am almost always attracted to men with big smiles. Which is freaky weird to me because I have a huge smile, so it’s like I am secretly attracted to myself.
I was once attracted to my ex’s younger brother. They looked a lot like and had similar voices and the younger one seemed to have all the other qualities the older was missing. And the younger one was closer to my age. However, I couldn’t get past the fact that they were crazy people from a crazy family and I thank God every time it crosses my mind for saving me from that. Serious, thank you, Jesus.
Upenzi means love in swahili!
Anyway, it aint odd liking on this girl. Its jst gonna be weird when ur hangin out and u remember something bout ur ex that used to piss u off then u get angry at her for no reason!
That happens to me too. I’m seriously attracted to this one dude right now who could be my crazy ex’s twin (except he’s a lot more buff. And probably not as nuts). It can work in the reverse too though: for another ex, any guy I see that looks remotely similar to him, even if he’s really cute otherwise, I just CANNOT get jiggy with. Bad memories!
I went to school with a young lady who was VERY attractive. She was an educated Southern sister with the ideal breast to booty ratio. Unfortunately, she had a resemblance to my grandmother when my grandmother was in her 20s. She even had some of my grandmother’s mannerisms. I just couldn’t do it. People told me I was tripping, but I I couldn’t holla at a woman who looked my mother’s mother. Just couldn’t do it…
LoL@ Jabari’s comment!
Apparently, I’m attracted to assholes.
That’s all I got.
*kicks rocks*
You and Me have good taste. I too am attracted to “pretty” before and after everything else.
*High Five*