A gay Lakers fan tried to pick me up last night. After a late workout, I decided to stop by Lounge of III and catch the 2nd half of Game 4 of the NBA Finals between the Boston Celtics and Los Angeles Lakers. It’s the 1 year anniversary of the place, so I figured at the very least, I’d see a bunch of familiar faces while there. The one variable I could not anticipate, was the loud, drunk gay guy standing near the bar yelling every time the Lakers scored.
From the guy’s body language and effeminate manner of cheering for Kobe Bryant, I had a feeling that he was probably some kind of connoisseur of penis. I just kept on watching the game, and laughed whenever his cheering got extra over-the-top, causing serious basketball fans to look at him like he was crazy. Then, it happened. Gay Lakers Fan turned and looked at me then stopped with one of those dramatic gay pauses, on some wide-eyed fashion model sh*t. I think he was aiming for that Derek Zoolander “Blue Steel” look or something.
I responded by looking back at him as if he just farted, but doesn’t think that anyone else knows he farted. The look that say “You disgust me, you nasty motherf*cker.”
Gay Lakers Fan finished his little shimmery glitter glance and said something in a drunken slur which I could not decipher, so I just shook my head and pointed at the TV screen. That was the nicest way I could think of brushing him off. Next, this fool went all kinds of out of bounds. He touched me on the shoulder, looked in my eyes, leaned in and said “You already won the game.”
I responded “Nah nigga! I ain’t playing THAT game!” and brushed his hand off my shoulder. He shot me an indignant look and went back over to the chick that was sitting with him near the bar. I’m pretty sure he was over there calling me all kinds of bitches and whatnot, but I didn’t care since he was leaving me alone now. I told one of my friends about it, and he said the same dude hit on him earlier that night. Apparently, Lakers Fan was playing the Gay Law of Averages and hitting on every piece of man-candy in the entire place.
I really don’t have a cool ending for this entry. I just wanted to tell that story since it was hilarious to me. This has been a great NBA Finals series so far. I look forward to watching the rest of the games. Hopefully, I will be able to do so without any more drunken gay Casanovas attempting to holler at me. Gay Lakers Fan really should have gone a block or two down U Street to that sports bar Nellie’s. From the outside(which is as close as I’m going), that gay sports bar looks like it’s nice! He could have probably met Mr. Right in there, instead of wasting his time violating my poor shoulder with his hand.
I can’t lie though, I might use his “You already won the game” line on a chick one day. I’ll let y’all know how that works out for me.
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I didn’t know Nellie’s was a gay sports bar. Guess it’s good that I have never been inside.
It was hard for me to get through the story because I was laughing so hard at that picture. It says so SO much. ESPECIALLY considering the content of your story. LMAO!
I laughed so hard that I cried when you twitter that last night. You are right people be setting up for the epic fail and that is why your blogs are the funniest.
@ Raainmayun, I wasn’t sure at first either, but I realized I never saw ANY women in that place at all and started putting 2&2 together! They advertise being a gay bar now.
@ Kindra I chose it for a reason!
@ The Smoking Ace, yeah man, folks always play themselves around me for some reason. I guess I’m approachable to a fault!
First, kudos for pulling Zoolander and Blue Steel out the crates. Second, the pick up line could work under the right conditions. Third, yall got some bold gay guys in DC.
Every body is the same.
We can’t treat a different atitude just for he is a gay.Right?
@ 2010mlb, I think I understand what you just attempted to type. Yes, he is a human being and deserves the same basic respect as everyone else. He became the butt of jokes when he made his unwanted advance, and put his hands on me. I hope that explains it for you.
@ caviarjones, I think that guy had liquor courage