How many of you have been so drunk that you had The Pee Dream? Don’t be afraid to admit it! You know, the dream where you think you’re in front of the toilet and it feels real…until moisture wakes you up and it literally feels TOO real! All you can do at that point is get up running to the bathroom in a desperate attempt not to ruin your sheets or anything else in the path between you and the pisser!
I haven’t been THAT f*cked up in a very long time, but the last two instances where I talked about The Pee Dream with people, they could relate to having that EXACT same dream and frantic rush to the bathroom. Therefore, I know that I am not alone! Then again, I probably am alone, since I’m most likely the only person willing to share my Pee Dream experience with the entire world. In print, no less!
To me, it’s hilarious the way the human mind works when you’re THAT drunk. It’s almost as if the brain and bladder have the following conversation with each other:
Bladder: Man, I can’t take it anymore! Get ‘cho ass up and let’s go to the bathroom!
Brain: Sorry. Too tired. I am not moving.
Bladder: SHEEEEIIIT. You better figure out something! I can’t hold on much longer!!!
Brain: Alright! Alright! I’ll play a trick on this fool and make him think that he actually got up. It’s about time for him to buy a new mattress anyway…
Whatever the case, it’s one of the funniest forms of bodily betrayal imaginable! Do yourself a favor and take a piss BEFORE you lay down next time you’re super drunk. To all of you who have had The Pee Dream but are too scared to admit it, it’s O.K. Your urine-stained secret is safe with me.
Oh yeah, I included the clip from Friday After Next because I laugh every time Money Mike asks “Did you pee on me?“
You don’t have to be drunk to have the pee dream. In my pee dream, I usually end up going over and over. Each time, it feels so real. Then, I have to go again. Last night was an unusual pee dream, in that I didn’t pee because the stalls in my college dorm bathroom were so nasty. Instead, I kept checking back, hoping to find a clean one. Finally I woke up. No moisture involved. (yes, I was back in college, but oddly, not drunk.)
You don’t have to be drunk to have the pee dream. In my pee dream, I usually end up going over and over. Each time, it feels so real. Then, I have to go again. Last night was an unusual pee dream, in that I didn’t pee because the stalls in my college dorm bathroom were so nasty. Instead, I kept checking back, hoping to find a clean one. Finally I woke up. No moisture involved. (yes, I was back in college, but oddly, not drunk.) Thanks for letting me share.
oops. delete the first one. And this one.
The pee dream is scary. Like I’ll wake up in panic and have to touch my bed just to make sure it wasn’t wet.