Washington DC area sports fans, we deserve better than this. Upon watching the Philadelphia Eagles put up a college basketball final score against the Redskins last night, I became inspired. That inspiration did not come from watching Michael Vick essentially treat my team like Ben Roethlisberger treats the women he meets in the club(although I am happy to see him successful). It came from one Twitter tweet from a local model chick who was sympathetic to one of the Redskins. Don’t ask me to put her screen name on blast, because I follow over 1,000 people and I really can’t remember exactly which scantily-clad profile photo I can attribute seeing the comment next to. Whomever it was, I typed this in response:
That was the moment that the “No Wins, No Trim” movement was born. I need all of the women of the DC area to band together in a pact, and swear off having sex with athletes on local teams until they start winning some games. The way it’s looking right now, the Washington Capitals are the only team in the area whose sex lives should go unaffected by this. I am no master of NFL odds, but even if I were, I never would have foreseen the Redskins getting whupped as badly as they did last night! Maybe if the threat of going sexless for an entire week were looming over their heads, they might have mustered up a little something and at least made the game competitive.
I know, I know. It’s probably not smart of me to expect groupie hoes to exercise discipline. However, it’s for the greater good, so please, abstain from pleasuring any Redskins or Wizards until they get their acts together. No sex, no hand-jobs, no hugs, no nothing! Apparently, making a whole lot of money isn’t enough motivation to get them to be good at their jobs, so maybe this’ll do the trick.
My movement may not be as noble as “No Wedding, No Womb,” but just like that one, it comes from a good place. We just might be having championship parades in DC once again, if the talented athletes here realize there are actual consequences to losing. Let’s keep this movement going on Twitter under the hashtag #NoWinsNoTrim
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Glad you enjoyed this
I honestly felt bad for fans of the redskins that night. It was as if someone had switched your mascot to rottweiler and Mike Vick had flashbacks.
It also begs the question.. why didn’t y’all take a chance on him after he got out? Based on where he is from he had to have been a fan back in the day.
I wanted them to sign Vick, too. It kills me that Dan Snyder will overpay all kinds of random free agents, but he won’t take a chance on someone with that kind of upside…
Sorry Leon but my eagles had to put a hurting on the redskins ..pause…
it’s basketball season or should i say HOCKEY season being a DC Sports Fan
The no trim no win policy might actually produce results around here. But under no circumstances should anyone give Haynesworth any ass – EVER! Isn’t he too big to be throwing hissy fits on the field or worse giving up during a game?