ESPN anchor Sage Steele has the coolest name ever. You could be anything from a superhero to a porn star with a name like “Sage Steele.” If I were her man, I’d feel compelled to change my name to some kind of ultra-powerful porn star name, too. Here are a few that I came up with:
- Rod Thunderstaff
- Jackhammer McGinty
- Homicide Ramirez
- Beef Wellington
- Spike Penetrate
I remember her from her days at the local Comcast Sportsnet station, when I would watch her show and think to myself “She’s has a nice smile, but her name makes me think that she could beat me up and take my lunch money.” Let’s hope that she is no relation to Michael Steele. If so, the douchebag jackass genes must have skipped her side of the family.
So yeah, that’s it. I just wanted to share my thoughts on Sage Steele in a couple of paragraphs, and Michael Steele in two sentences. Feel free to help me come up with my own porn star action hero name, or let me know which one of the five that I have already thought of sounds the best. I need to be ready in case Sage reads this and decides to make me her new man-bitch. I assume that’s how anyone with a name as powerful as Sage Steele would refer to her gentleman-lover.
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Man I was thinking the same thing when I first saw her in ESPN. Can you imagine Tapping Dat Azz #105 ‘Sage Steele vs. Lexington Steele’?
As much as I like smut, I can’t say that I’d watch that.
…ok. F*ck it. I would.
Funny that Sage Steele and Mike Steele have one thing in common, they’re republicans.
Not that this surprises me…but where did you find that out?
Now that was pretty funny. However, someone please get the sister something to eat! The woman looks like she’s starving!
LOL
My porn name would be “Roast Beaf”. Or maybe… D’Ante Assington. Areola Johnson?
There was a wide reciever who played for the Browns back in the ’70s named “Fair Hooker”. I’m not kidding. Google it. That’s not as bad as “Dick Butkis” but it’s close.
LOL! “The Fairest Hooker in all the land”
Leon,
I was bored at work and looked up athletes with peculiar names. You couldn’t make up stuff this strange. Here is a list of acutal athletes. Feel free to Google them:
Rusty Kuntz
Dick Pole
Chubby Cox
Dick Trickle (It sounds fake but it’s not!)
Pete La Cock (I remember this dude! Baseball player)
Ron Tugnutt (He was a hocky player)
Assol Slivits
Homer Bush
De’Cody Fag
Misty Hyman
and my favorite…………………………..
JOHNNY DICKSHOT. (Played baseball in the ’30s)
The only one I knew of before this was Dick Trickle. He’s a Nascar driver!
LOL @ Homicide Ramirez
*dead* @ Beef Wellington
Beef Wellington is my favorite one too!