Two Reasons For Me To Get My Soul Right With Jesus

Gucci Mane tattoos three scoops of ice cream on his face. You can't make this sh*t up!

…Because laughing at these pictures just may reserve my 1st Class ticket to Hell. Let’s start off with Radric Davis, aka Gucci Mane. I saw this photo of him with an ice cream cone tattooed on his face in my twitter feed, and my first thought was “Please let this be Photoshop and not some horrible life decision.” Alas, it’s real. This man actually tattooed three scoops of ice cream in a cone with lightning bolt sprinkles on his cheek. I try to live a non-violent lifestyle, but if one of my friends were to get a tattoo like that I’d slap the sh*t out of him. And he’d deserve every bit of it. Too bad Gucci’s friends weren’t willing to give him that same tough love. Moving on…

Gabourey Sidibe and a date sitting courtside

I saw this picture of Gabourey Sidibe on Facebook, and I tried to take the high road. Lord knows I tried. But I failed. Miserably. The first thing I noticed was that the her dude with the Latrell Sprewell B2K braids looks super uncomfortable. The next thing I noticed, is that Gabourey Sidibe kinda favors Mark Henry from the WWE. Minus the beard, of course.


In Sidibe’s defense, she’s an Oscar-nominated movie star, and me? Well…I’m just some f*cking guy named Leon writing a blog…So even if Gabourey does look like a former Olympic power lifter turned pro wrestler, she’s already won this battle. I hope her and her dude are happy, despite the fact that I never, ever, EVER want to think about a sex tape featuring them.

As you can see, I’ve been on a jonin’ jihad the past couple of days, cracking jokes about any and everything ridiculous that crosses my path. This is why I’m about to say some extra prayers and then do something nice for a stranger. Otherwise, I may never stop clowning, and end up being the real-life version of those old dudes from the Muppet Show, Stadler and Waldorf. I don’t want to spend the rest of my days sitting in a balcony talking sh*t. Therefore, I’m going to get these last few jokes out, then do some good to get my karma nice and balanced again.

Before I end this entry, here is something good for starters: Please take about 5 seconds of your time to stop by the Pepsi Refresh Project and vote to fund a gene therapy to cure the genetic disorder Sanfilippo Syndrome. There is more info about the condition as well as details about the project on the voting page. Thanks in advance!

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This post was written by who has written 1853 posts on Yeah…I said it.

Leon, a.k.a. God's Gift to your sense of humor.

16 Responses to “Two Reasons For Me To Get My Soul Right With Jesus”

  1. Ntoks 13. Jan, 2011 at 9:05 am #

    I think the Mental Institution he was in a a couple of days ago should refund him…

  2. Ntoks 13. Jan, 2011 at 9:06 am #

    thats Gucci im talking bout..

    • ListenToLeon 13. Jan, 2011 at 2:42 pm #

      I know. You’re right. He needs to check himself back in and take all the time he needs to get right!

  3. Wonderlove 13. Jan, 2011 at 2:03 pm #

    You wouldn’t be curious to see at least a tad peek of Gabby’s tape…a little curious?

    • ListenToLeon 13. Jan, 2011 at 2:42 pm #

      There ain’t enough curiosity in the world.

  4. Cliff 13. Jan, 2011 at 3:13 pm #

    I saw the ice cream tattoo picture this morning. The sad thing about it – it was the first thing I clicked on to start my morning. This picture has destroyed my whole day. Where in the hell are his parents? Somebody needs to airlift Bill Cosby to his house for an intervention. I can hear Bill now “boy, where is your pride?”

    As for the second picture, that dude needs an intervention as well. His boys need to toss a potato sack over him, throw him in a car trunk, and hall him off to an intervention at the Playboy mansion. I don’t care what anyone says, there isn’t enough beer and hard liquor on this planet to get me drunk enough to f%ck Gabourey Sidibe. Actually, I want her boyfriends autograph. That dude is the NEW AND IMPROVED IRON MAN. Honestly, could you imagine that chick naked? Seeing her undressed would cause hair loss, male impotence, high blood pressure, and seizures (I could name another 82 side effects but you get the point).

    • ListenToLeon 13. Jan, 2011 at 3:31 pm #

      LMAO!!! Sorry to hear that the Gucci tatt ruined your day!

  5. BK 13. Jan, 2011 at 3:18 pm #

    WTFudge?????? Son ice cream cone tatted on his face??? like REALLY and is it me or does that dude look like a girl with Gabby??? *reserving my seat right next to you on the train to hell*

    • ListenToLeon 13. Jan, 2011 at 3:31 pm #

      He looks like an extra from “You Got Served”

  6. DC 13. Jan, 2011 at 4:02 pm #

    Damn, she’s a big bitch….but swole up girls need love too….

  7. BigLee 13. Jan, 2011 at 4:30 pm #

    LMAO @ Chris! You hit the nail on the head! @Leon, keep up the good work on your blog, you make my day with laughter! Karma is a B***H so keep up with helping strangers! This is too funny!

  8. M Slade 13. Jan, 2011 at 4:51 pm #

    Y’know, there are some hefty women I could smash. But I have my limits. And someone the size of Sherrie Shephard from the View is it. Now her gut is big enough to hide a small bag of Doritos and a 5th grade book report in it. But I could lift that flab up and go to town.

    But Gabourey Sidibe? She’s waaaaaaaaaaaay past the line. Laying on top of her must be like swimming in Crisco. And if you think your getting some, she’s so big you might just be hittin’ a crease. And if home girl rolls over on you…CANCEL CHRISTMAS. No thank you.

  9. NAYDIA 14. Jan, 2011 at 9:46 am #

    i have nothing against plus size woman but she is one thats very very unattractive point blank. There are some thicky thick women who are sexy i.e Jill Scott. But this chic is just visually unappealing, she dress tacky and she is starring him down all crazy like! Im starting to wonder if she paid him to date her.

  10. CurlyQ 14. Jan, 2011 at 2:29 pm #

    Someone else put into words what i couldn’t when speaking on Gucci –

    “AND WHY DO THE ‘VISUALLY CHALLENGED TO LOOK AT’ DO THINGS TO MAKE THEM MORE ‘VISUALLY CHALLENGED TO LOOK AT’???? NEVER FIGURED THAT ONE OUT. LOL!!!…….

  11. Ol'Bubbleguts 15. Jan, 2011 at 11:38 pm #

    Roll her in flour and look for the wetspot!
    She positively makes Shirley Hemphill (RIP 976-SEXY CB4) look anorexic.

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