Yes, this woman is real. Her name is Patricia Krentcil. She is facing criminal charges for allegedly taking her 5 year old daughter into a tanning booth with her. Judging from her char-broiled appearance, I doubt that any jury on Earth would believe a word she says. The only thing missing from this fool’s face is a Spalding emblem. I first saw an image for this story & thought it was about someone in blackface. I got offended. Then I got unoffended. Then I got offended again, since this is actually real.
I blame the tanning salon for letting her do this to herself in the first place. When they see someone whose skin looks like a patent leather handbag coming in the door, they should be like bartenders and say “Nah, you’re cut off” for her own good.
Besides, if I were a tanning salon customer and saw someone like that walking out the door, I’d be like “What in the Hell kind of Dr. Frankenstein’s laboratory tanning place is this?!” and run for the hills.
That broad looks like beef jerky. Hulk Hogan looks at her and thinks to himself “This bitch went too far.” Someone please stage an intervention on her behalf.
It’s kind of messed up that seeing this woman’s horrid image made me totally forget that this story is supposed to be about child endangerment. I hope that the little girl is OK and that Ms. Krentcil gets whatever psychiatric help she needs to conquer this addiction to the tanning bed…Mainly because she looks like a God-damned fool.
In much better looking news, I was recently featured on my friend Gerald’s website wearing a limited-edition Frank 151 fitted cap he was giving away. I look super Instagrammed on this picture, but it’s still better than Leatherface Patty up above.Tweet