You have to love how friends find ways of reminding you of moments you thought your mind had fully repressed. Unfortunately my blocked out recollections were somewhat strippery. I went to New York last weekend to see my best friends from college, Wade and E. While there, E reminded me of something I’d totally forgotten: I was the original Magic Mike. The Black Magic Mike, at that. Magic Mike Jenkins. Or more accurately, the Black Magic Mike Who Looks Like Hispanic Magic Mike. Mágico Miguel.
Back in the day, Wade’s mother, father and grandmother came to Hampton University to pay him a visit for the weekend. That Saturday night there was a Greek step show which the entire campus was looking forward to. What E, Wade and the rest of Wade’s family did not know was that I’d agreed to be one of the sexy flexy muscle men escorting the girls from a sorority that shall remain anonymous out before they started stepping.
The performance was pretty tasteless. I went onstage shirtless, greased up in some baggy jeans and Timberlands. It was like a bad Jodeci video. I may as well have yelled out “IS THERE ANYBODY OUT THERE KNOW WHAT I’M TALKING ‘BOUT? SOME-BODY! ANY-BODY! JODECI! LET ME HEAR YOU SAY YEA-A-A-AAA-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-AAAH!”
Oh, did I mention that Wade’s parents were taping the step show? During the performance, this is all you could hear in the background:
Wade’s Mom: “Wade, is that your friend Leon?”
Wade: “Is that Leon? Wait a minute; I think it is!”
Wade’s Grandmother: “Why doesn’t he have his shirt on?”
E: “THAT N*GGA LEON IS A MAN-WHORE!!!”
As Buff Bagwell as I was looking that day, I’m pretty sure I purposely repressed that memory. I hadn’t thought about it in years until E started calling me The Original Man Whore when I got to NY.
It’s funny though, because that’s the kind of friendship we have. I’m short and light skinned, he’s tall and dark skinned, but our personalities are very similar. Therefore, we jone on each other relentlessly. E makes a disparaging high yellow comment, and I say he looks like a piece of licorice that can speak. That’s just how it goes. We’ve have a friendly extremely light vs extremely dark joke battle going on for years. We’re not trying to kill each other like Storm Shadow & Snake Eyes. It’s simply for laughs.
So now that I’ve managed to talk about being half naked onstage, sing Jodeci ad-libs and set the entire Black race back 30 years, I’ll end things for now. Thanks to Wade and E for helping me remember this crazy story.