How many of you have been so drunk that you had The Pee Dream? Don’t be afraid to admit it! You know, the dream where you think you’re in front of the toilet and it feels real…until moisture wakes you up and it literally feels TOO real! All you can do at that point is get [...]
Tag Archives: Pee
Kegel Exercises FTW!
How do you top writing your name in the snow in pee? There’s only one way: by creating performance art! I used my creative gifts as well as my oh-so-formidable anatomical ones to attempt to make a smiley face on Thursday night. Although it’s not perfect, you have to be impressed by the stop-start action [...]
It’s Snowing In DC
Yes that’s my name. Yes, I whipped out my d*ck and pee-wrote it in the fresh snow. No, I do not give a damn. Don’t judge me! I just hope that it keeps on snowing, because I did that right in front of my neighbor’s garage. The worst part is that you can follow my [...]
Run-In With The Hanson Faithful
Last night, I experienced the surreal, thanks to Hanson. Yes, THAT Hanson. The former long-haired 90′s kiddie group that’s all grown up now. My night started at an event where free Guinness was being given to people. Many hours and dark beverages later, I decided to get some carry-out chicken to keep my alcohol company. [...]
City Councilman Makes It Rain
I got this story from Twitter, via Fox 5 NewsEdge. If you’re on Twitter and you’re from the area, I recommend following them. This weekend, a Jersey City, NJ councilman made it rain in a local DC club. Only thing is, it wasn’t exactly the way that Fat Joe and Lil’ Wayne rhymed about. This [...]
Where the Hell is the Pee Key?
The office that I work in is one where you need to use a key to get into the bathroom. Yesterday after eating lunch and drinking a giant bottle of gatorade, I felt the need to go do #1. To my dismay, BOTH of the bathroom pee keys were gone! This meant that not only [...]
DC Water Supply Spiked With Crazy Juice
DC’s water supply must’ve been spiked with Crazy Juice. That is the only explanation imaginable for all of the wild stuff that happened in my neighborhood this past Friday night. The night was intended to be one of relaxation, but it ended up looking more like an action movie. Don’t believe me? Check out the [...]
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