There are very few things on Earth that make my skin crawl. At or near the top of that list, is women with bad wigs and/or weaves. I hate to do it, but I must speak on this topic, since folks have asked me to clarify my stance on the matter.
It all boils down to one simple sentence: If it appears to be quite artificial, then just say no! I’m not talking about looking a little bit fake. I’m talking about weaves that sit up on top or real hair. Weaves where you can see the glue and other stuff used to keep it in place. Weaves that have the visible lace front that resembles the beginning of some pantyhose. Those are the worst ones in my opinion, because it makes me think that after I finish dancing with this woman, she’s gonna pull a nylon stocking down from the front of her hair and rob me at gunpoint.
Wigs…what can I say? When your hairline appears to be AN ACTUAL LINE, it makes me wonder about you. What is this woman trying to hide? Does she have a bald spot with tiny little hair sprouts in the front like Rob Coddry? Does she hate herself? Or just me? Why God? Why?!?!
If any of you female readers is suffering from baldness, I am not trying to make fun of your plight. I am merely trying to educate the public, in my own heavy-handed, brutally honest way. If you do not need to cover up bald spots or hide a hairstyle gone awry, then please avoid wigs and bad weaves. Go natural, or wear your own hair in a style that complements you. However, if you must make that move to sport a wig or weave, remember these tips:
- Don’t choose any crazy colors. You see the woman in the photo above? She wouldn’t be bad looking, if she’d decided against that 1999 Venus Williams look she has on her head. That look screams out ” I work in the sex trade.”
- Be realistic about the length. Please do not go for that “Tina Turner” look.
- Expect to get called out from time to time. People talk, you know.
I hope this gave you all a little more insight into my disdain for bad weaves and wigs. I’m against most ridiculously artificial enhancements in general, but the hair thing is at or near the top of the list since it’s among the most noticable things about a person. I know India Arie made that song “I Am Not My Hair” which had a wonderful message, but I beg to differ ladies. When your head looks both fake AND ridiculous, then yes, you are your hair!