Today is the last day to vote for me in the Technology category of the Black Weblog Awards and I need your support. I know this is not a Tech blog per-se, but it’s definitely geek-friendly most of the time. I like to think that technological advances always open the door for humor, mainly because without an established precedent on how and when to use something, people do stupid things. For example:
- Think about every time you’ve seen someone walking down the street using one of those Star Trek looking bluetooth headsets, looking like they’re talking to themselves like a crazy fool. I silently judge every person I see doing this. Driving is the only time when this behavior is understandable. Well, if you’re a secret service agent, maybe…but since it’s highly unlikely that you have a license to kill with the name Jack Bauer on it, please, cut that bullsh*t out.
- People who still keep their cell phones on a holster inspire comedy as well. Once again, if you are not a plain clothes law enforcement officer or headed to the O.K. Corral for a duel at high noon, you have no excuse for wearing a holster of any kind. Note that neither of these examples mentioned cell phones. HOLSTERS ARE FOR GUNS!
- I can mention Anthony Weiner one more time over here, not just for letting Twitter ruin his career, but for doing it in a way where he can’t even say his last name out loud in public without being reminded of his dumb ass indiscretions. Don’t be surprised if this guy embarks on a porn career in a year or two. He may as well get something out of this mess he’s gotten himself into.
See how easy it is? Technology ensures that I’ll never run out of funny things to say. Even if I were to get into some kind of horrible accident, I will get one of those Stephen Hawking talking keyboard thingies and threaten to slap the sh*t outta you in a robot voice! Don’t think I won’t!
I did experience a Technology Fail recently however. I discovered that my Google Analyitics code has been installed wrong for years now. All this time, it was only tracking the results of one page, as opposed to the entire site itself. I know it was wrong, because I put the proper code in last Friday, then checked it yesterday and saw that my traffic was up 17,500.00%. I didn’t even write anything yesterday! Obviously, It’s been screwed up for quite some time. I fixed it though, which is what a good Technology Blogger does.Tweet