Hopefully you’re more impressed with this than McKayla was
When I’m alone in my room sometimes I stare at the wall, and in the back of my mind I hear my conscience call…Oh! Hello internet! Did not realize you all were standing there. I was having a James Todd Smith moment while thinking about Valentines Day. I made a miniature mixtape this year, as I have been busy with larger creative endeavors I plan to unleash on you in the very near future. My original plan was to put out a Valentines mixtape consisting of music and jokes about love. Alas, I had too much to do, so you’re getting The Consolation Prize. Literally.
I compiled a brief list of six songs dedicated to those who are without Valentines today. Maybe you two conveniently broke up to avoid buying gifts for one another. Maybe you never had anyone in the first place and went Te’o by sending flowers to yourself at work. Maybe you thought you were his or her number 1, but their absence signals that you are lower on the courtship totem pole than you’d like to be. If so, these songs are for you:
James Brown – Blind Man Can See It – For those who had no idea they were side-pieces until today.
Elle Varner – I Don’t Care – A decent little song to listen to should you decide to go out and make single-people bad decisions tonight.
LL Cool J – Doin It – See “bad decisions” reference above, and please try to choose wisely.
Carl Thomas – The Baby Maker - Something to play should bad decisions end up being made. I think this was on last year’s mixtape, but I am too lazy to edit it this late in the game.
Faith Evans – Do Your Time – Just in case any of you are dating jailbirds right now.
Jaheim – Finding My Way Back – If you’re making an effort to win someone back today, this is a nice song to listen to.
I apologize in advance for the tracks being out of order. I have been super busy lately working on a web series, preparing for a trip to London & Paris and actively looking for a new job. I’ll try to reconfigure the jokes I wanted to put on this mixtape so that they’re not strictly Valentines-themed and properly release them later this year for you all. Once again, I could not feasibly put together a top-notch mixtape this year…but hey, it’s free! The Consolation Prize Mixtape
I am giving the entire internet the President Obama sexy eye right now. Happy Valentines Day!
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